This-essay is a7806011.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %MEANINGFUL INITIATIVES 780601 The meaning of an initiative depends heavily upon it being a genuine initiative, motivated from within the initiator, not by promptings on the part of others. The meaning of the absence of a hoped-for initiative depends upon whether or not the potential initiator was aware of the opportunity for an initiative. A conscious choice not to take a consciously considered initiative means something different than a failure to take an initiative because of a lack of awareness---through ignorance, misinformation, collusion, repression, etc. In intimate personal relationships there is a great deal of communication focused upon the taking or not taking of initiatives. The understandings and misunderstandings which are thereby occasioned depend upon the degree of mutual awareness of possibilities for initiatives, and the significance each person attaches to the fulfillment or non-fulfillment of those possibilities. The significance of an initiative depends greatly upon the degree to which it is unprompted---expressive of the will of the initiator rather than of the will of another person. "Initiatives" are not very meaningful if they are elicited by overt efforts on the part of someone other than the "initiator". The kiss which is given only after is is overtly requested, is not as meaningful as the spontaneous kiss which is not expected. The "gift" which is given because it is demanded is not a meaningful gift. The boundary between pure initiatives and elicited initiatives is not a clean boundary. There are occasions when friends need to help each other become aware of the kinds of initiatives which would be welcomed---and the kinds which would not be welcome. Informing each other about such possibilities may best be via indirect and often non-verbal channels of communication. The more overt and verbal is the process of calling attention to welcomed initiative possibilities, the less meaningful are the initiatives likely to be if/when they are taken. Even so, verbal communication may play an essential role in the whole process. Meaningful initiatives are not occasioned by legalistic ways of regulating human behavior. Initiatives taken according to some systematic plan have relatively little meaning---for they do not spontaneously flow form the will. For this reason, legalism is unable to give meaning to living. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================
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