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%FINDING COMMON GROUND FRUSTRATION FAILURE BLOCK+970528
%LISTEN TOLERATE LIBERATE CONFIRM FOCUS ATTEND 970528
To contribute positively to communal efforts to Find
Common Ground we need to:
1. Let go of our own desires, "duties" and efforts
to force other people be like us and/or agree with
us.
2. Let go of deception, coercion and violence as
tools with which to try to get people to conform.
3. Be willing to let other people be true to
themselves and others about their own experiences,
perceptions, hopes, aspirations, fears, desires,
beliefs and convictions.
4. Listen attentively, carefully and sympathe-
tically to others' descriptions of their own
experiences, perceptions, hopes, aspirations, fears,
desires, beliefs and convictions.
5. Fear alienation from those whom we do not
understand --- more than we fear taking steps toward
understanding them.
6. Grant others the freedom not to Seek Common
Ground with us --- and be prudent and cautious in
our dealings with such people, so long as they
chose to remain alienated from us.
7. Withhold respect and support from the alienative
behaviors of people who persist in undermining
authentic efforts to Find Common Ground.
8. Tolerate non-destructive human differences.
9. Give up compulsive efforts to prove others
wrong, inferior, or worse.
10. Let go of efforts to be "better" than others.
11. Seek to work with others to fulfill the
creative possibilities which exist within our human
differences.
12. Openly and honestly describe --- rather than
prescribe and/or proscribe.
13. Seek with integrity to interpret other people's
words in reasonable ways with which we can agree.
14. Seek to confirm that we have heard accurately
what others have tried to tell us about themselves
--- by saying what we have heard, and asking for
confirmations from those to whom we have listened.
15. Seek to reach "win-win" conflict-resolutions.
16. Tolerate unavoidable ambiguity and paradoxes.
17. Prudently be humble, gentle, meek and mild.
18. Seek to promote balanced living for all --- in
all that we do.
19. Seek to promote both personal and communal
integrity; rather than demand conformity to our own
patterns of assumptions, attitudes, perceptions,
expressions and behaviors.
20. Let go of fruitless traditional questions and
ways of formulating contentious issues --- ways
which do not
help people Find Common Ground, or to cooperate.
21. Seek to formulate creative new questions which
will help people to cooperate in Finding Common
Ground for further cooperation.
22. Deal with spectrums of alternatives rather than
just with dichotomous either/or alternatives.
23. Invite more people to become involved in
efforts to Find Common Ground.
24. During the coming years focus upon positive
affirmations/suggestions which are supported by a
majority of participants.
25. During the coming few years focus most upon
positive affirmations/suggestions which rank highest
in priority votes of participants.
(c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in
www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty
(On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)
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