This-essay is a7708101.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %INTERDEPENDENCE-2 770810 Meaningful interdependence depends upon mutual acceptance of balanced dependency and vulnerability. Individuals who seek to be in full control of their situations can not be honestly and meaningfully interdependent---regardless of how interdependent they are in fact. Without mutual acceptance of mutual dependency and mutual vulnerability---the interdependency which is present will tend to be dishonest and meaningless. Meaningful interdependence depends upon balance and mutuality in dependency and vulnerability. The dependency and vulnerability must be mutual and mutually accepted. Resented dependency is not meaningful interdependence--- whether or not the dependent one is or is not the resentful one. Manipulative dependence is not meaningful interdependence---whether or not the dependent one is or is not the manipulative one. Meaningful interdependence depends upon mutuality in acceptance of the relationship. The manner and tone of acceptance is congruent within meaningful interdependencies. Extreme differences in the kind of acceptance will undermine the meaning of the interdependence, if not the fact of the interdependence. A marriage may be meaningless because husband and wife accept their interference for highly contrasting reasons, and with highly contrasting attitudes. In interdependent relationships the participants are vulnerable to changes in each other, and beneficiaries of the growth in each other. Meaningful interdependent relationships promote welcomed growth in the participants---in ways which can not be fully anticipated or planned by the participants. Even when the growth occasions grow-ing pains, the growth can be welcomed within the context of a meaningful interdependence. The growing pains are not resented---because the context insures that they are not meaningless pains. In interdependent relationships the participants contribute as they are able to the growth of the relationship and of each other. With humility and thanksgiving, accept from the relationship and participants that which is available/offered. An interdependence can be inhibited/destroyed by an unwillingness to accept, as well as by an unwillingness to give; by a compulsive desire to give too much, as well as by a desire to get too much. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================
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