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%INAPPROPRIATE MANIPULATIVE VULNERABILITY FRIEND+990627
%INTIMACY SEXUALITY BALANCE FOUNDATION EMBARRASSED 990627
Intimacy, vulnerability, friendship and sexuality are
inappropriate when they occur within contexts where
inadequate foundations have been built within the communal
context and/or within the context of an evolving
personal relationship. In these regards the approach
of one person to another person may be inappropriate
because:
1. There is an imbalance as regards to power.
2. The persons do now know each other well enough to
justify the suggested transition in the level/nature of
the relationship.
3. There has not been any indication/hint on the
part of the person approached --- of a receptivity for
the suggested transition in the level/nature of
the relationship.
4. The persons involved in the approach have not
learned enough about each other's values, ideals, hopes,
aspirations, fears, etc. --- to offer a firm foundation
for the suggested transition.
5. The approach may prudently be regarded as being
manipulative/coercive rather than authentic.
It is imprudent to push transitions in relationship
--- before the foundations for the transitions have
been firmly laid. The participants in a healthy
relationship may successfully communicate their sense
that they have succeeded in laying appropriate
foundations --- without resorting to extended verbal
communications, rules, regulations, prescriptions,
proscriptions, etc. It is not a simple matter to
indicate what is necessary and sufficient in
discerning when the appropriate foundations have been laid
--- whether discovered by an insider or by outsiders to
the relationship.
(c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in
www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty
(On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)
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