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%INTEGRATIVE COMMUNITY PERSON FALSE INTIMACY SEX+990326
%RECOGNIZE DESCRIBE POINTING TOWARD PERSPECTIVE 990326
Within truly integrative communities there are many
healthy people who recognize, name, describe, point to and
deal prudently with occasions of "false intimacy" which
are suggested below:
1. Manipulative people PRETEND TO BE WILLING TO
SHARE WITHIN THE CONTEXT OF OPEN AND HONEST RELATIONSHIPS
WHICH ENTAIL MUTUAL VULNERABILITY --- yet are really
seeking to gain the manipulative advantage of being
invulnerable while coercing another person into a position
of unbalanced vulnerability.
2. PRETENDING TO BE INVOLVED IN OPEN AND HONEST
COURTSHIP leading to a healthy long-term friendship of
mutual respect, support, honor, assistance, and comfort
--- so as to maneuver another person into a position of
vulnerability and insecurity which will be advantageous to
the manipulator.
3. BEING PREOCCUPIED WITH ISSUES OF CONTROL IN THE
HOPE OF GAINING MANIPULATIVE POWERS/ADVANTAGES --- while
pretending to be working to promote the welfare of the
community as a whole --- with integrity, honor, well-
being, peace and shalom.
4. BEING SUSPICIOUS OF PEOPLE WHO ARE TRULY ENJOYING
the freedom to be safely vulnerable within relationships
of mutual respect, honor, support, comfort, assistance and
integration --- due to fears that they will expose
essential collusive games of mutual self deception.
5. SEEKING TO ASSURE THAT ALL INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS
ARE PROPERLY CONTROLLED --- to make them conform to
standard forms of respected transactions and inter-actions
between proper people.
6. GOING THROUGH THE PHYSICAL MOTIONS OF APPEARING
to be involved in integrative inter-personal relationships
--- when in spirit all the exercises are for the purpose
of appearing to be proper, right, righteous, respectable,
secure, pure, better, and invulnerable.
7. PROMOTING PARALYSIS THROUGH PREOCCUPATIONS WITH:
perfection, purity, propriety, competition, correctness,
conformity, appearances, reputations, success,
achievements, failures, mistakes, faults, blunders, etc.
8. FEARING TO LET GO TO the promptings of Holy
Spirit --- because the promptings of Holy Spirit entail
doing risky new things and being transformed, reconciled,
and involved in conflict resolution --- wherein
vulnerability is shared openly and honestly within safe
contexts which are built together through cooperative
efforts.
(c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in
www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty
(On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)
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