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%GUILT SHAME WILLINGLY INTERNALIZED COHERENT SETS+970907
%ATTITUDE IDEA IDEAL VALUE PRINCIPLES INTEGRITY+970907
%DISCIPLES LOVE ENDEARING HONOR RESPECT CELEBRITY 970907
When guilt and/or shame flow naturally from
willingly internalized coherent sets of attitudes, ideas,
ideals, values and principles --- healthy guilt and shame
arise and both motivate and lead to appropriate
confessions, forgiveness, reconciliation and integrative
healing --- which in turn promote both personal and
communal integrity.
When through coercive and/or violent efforts --- guilt
and/or shame are externally imposed upon people who have
internalized inadequate and/or incoherent sets of
attitudes, ideas, ideals, values and principles --- then
alienation is intensified --- and people are motivated and
led into secrecy, dishonesty, anger, conflicts and more
disintegrative coercions and violence --- which in turn
promote both personal and communal disintegration.
Healthy guilt and shame cannot be externally imposed
upon anybody. Attempts to impose guilt and shame upon
anybody are unhealthy attempts --- which only compound the
dilemmas and/or problems which such attempts are
ostensibly supposed to help resolve and/or solve.
People who have done things for which they "should"
feel guilt and/or shame --- cannot be forced to feel as
they "should" feel. Force is impotent (powerless) in such
situations. Force does not work to engender and cannot be
made to engender healthy guilt and/or shame.
Personal and communal integrity are both promoted and
facilitated through open and honest dialogue which
encourages people to willingly internalize coherent sets
of attitudes, ideas, ideals, values and principles ---
which, in turn, naturally engender wise behavior and true
regret, guilt and/or shame --- when they are appropriate -
--following tragic and/or accidental: mistakes, blunders,
errors and/or failures. Force, coercion and violence are
not helpful in this process --- instead they are
disintegrative.
People who neither acknowledge nor behave-in-terms-of
these considerations --- often behave in ways which lead
to both personal and communal disintegration. Often they
are proud of how self-righteous they are because of their
destructive efforts --- oblivious of the fact that true
righteousness has to do with rightly participating in open
and honest dialogue within intimate relationships which
are facilitated by the free exchange of gifts of security
enjoyed as the freedom to be safely vulnerable.
People who are endearing, integrative and highly
respected in healthy ways acknowledge and/or behave in
terms of these considerations --- and inspire others to do
likewise as formal or informal disciples of Love.
(c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in
www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty
(On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)
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