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%HEALTHY GUILT SHAME DISINTEGRATIVE PERSON COMMUNAL+970323
%SEXUAL INTIMATE COERCION MANIPULATE VIOLATE IMPOSE+970323
%DISHONEST CONTROL DESIRE CHOICE ACTIONS BEHAVE GOD+970323
%OUTSIDE INSIDE TRAGIC CONSTRAIN FAIL GOOD EVIL SIN 970323

     Healthy  guilt  and  shame flow  from  regrets  about
choices  and  actions which have undermined  personal  and
communal integrity.

     Healthy  guilt  and shame do not flow from  coercion,
manipulations, violence, dishonesty or imposed commands.

     Healthy  guilt  and shame flow from  making  coercive
choices,  manipulative choices,  choices to violate and be
violent,   choices  to  be  dishonest, choices  to  impose
constraints upon people which they do  not welcome because
of coercion, manipulations,  violence and dishonesty---and
then regretting  the recognized disintegrative choices and
actions which flowed from them.

     Healthy guilt and shame flow freely from inside.

     Healthy guilt and shame are not imposed from outside.

     Un-healthy  guilt and shame are imposed from  outside
of  self  through  disintegrative attempts  by  others  to
control    people---through   the   use    of    coercion,
manipulations, violence and dishonesty.

     Healthy  guilt  and shame may flow from  inside  self
because of disintegrative attempts  by  self to try impose
un-healthy guilt and shame from outside upon others.

     Un-healthy  guilt  and shame may be  engendered  from
outside of self by disintegrative attempts by other people
who are preoccupied  with issues of control and attempt to
use guilt and shame to  gain  personal advantages---at the
expense  of  the people who are made to feel the  pain  of
imposed guilt and  shame.    Imposed  guilt  and shame are
disintegrative; not healthy.

     To  the  extent that we are in truly in Love  we  are
free of un-healthy guilt and shame; free of threats of the
imposition  of  un-healthy  guilt and shame, and  free  of
temptations to threaten or try to impose un-healthy  guilt
and shame upon others.

     God  is  Love and does not threaten or try to  impose
guilt  or shame upon anybody.    If we are truly in  Love,
with  God,  we do not threaten or try to impose  guilt  or
shame upon anybody.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
  www.essayz.com       Search for Integrity and Honesty        
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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