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 %SEXUAL PLEASURE GUIDELINES INTEGRITY PERSONAL SIN+970127
   %LEGALISTIC IDOLATRY ULTIMATE COMMAND JUDGEMENTS+970127
%FABRIC WEB PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS CONNECTIONS LOVE 970127

     What  are some guidelines by which we can  anticipate
when sexual desires,  fantasies,  daydreams,  excitations,
preludes,   invitations and activities are likely to  lead
towards personal and communal disintegration?

                    When:

     1.  Unbalanced  power is used by a person or  persons
so as to --- intimidate,  threaten,  use,  abuse, neglect,
manipulate,  coerce, violate or otherwise alienate someone
perceived  as weaker.   The unbalance in power may pertain
to age,  sex, gender, maturity, health, education,  family
of origin,  nation of origin,  culture,  race,   religion,
economics  or any other factor according to which power is
dispensed or withheld.

     2.  There  is  ignorance about  the  transmission  of
disease through sexual activity and/or there is neglect to
make  prudent use of knowledge about the  transmission  of
disease through sexual activity.

     3.  There   is  ignorance  about  the   relationships
between healthy/unhealthy  sexual activities,   pregnancy,
birth,  parenting and death---and/or the neglect  to  make
prudent use of knowledge about about such relationships.

     4.  People  promote the above kinds of  imbalance  of
power,  ignorance and/or neglect---with sexual motivations
playing a role in the promotions.

     5.  One  or  more  persons fail to  be  sensitive  to
and/or fail to give fair considerations to the  desires of
any other person---whether the  desires are,   or are not,
forcefully expressed.

     6.  One or more persons are dishonest with themselves
and/or others about some aspect(s)  of human sexuality  or
their  own sexuality---or are tempted to be dishonest---or
they  neglect to be open and honest when the free flow  of
information   is  essential  to  personal   and   communal
integrity.

     7.  Excessive preoccupations (of any kind) with human
sexuality  (of  self and/or others)  lead  to  unbalanced,
perverted  and/or  alienative personal  relationships  and
life-styles.

     8.  Guidelines such as these are turned into absolute
commandments   and/or  formalized  and  made  matters   of
ultimate   concern  in  ways  which  engender   alienative
relationships.

     9.  Considerations  which focus upon human  sexuality
are  used as tools by some people to try to achieve  self-
righteousness   at   the  expense  of  others  whom   they
excommunicate.

     10.  People  are tempted to use (and/or try  to  use)
people,  romances and/or sexual activities, considerations
and relationships as fixes and/or means to salvation.

     11.  People  do  not know each other well  enough  to
have  offered to,  and accepted from,  each  other's  true
gifts  of  security  known as the  freedom  to  be  safely
vulnerable in intimate relationships;   supported in,  and
by each other's presence.

     12.  People  have not been open and honest with  each
other  about  who they are;   e.g.,    their  motivations,
interests,  hopes, aspirations, ideals, values,  fears and
anxieties.

     13.  People  are preoccupied with addictions,   fixes
and codependent supporters of their fixes and addictions.

     14.  People  are  preoccupied  with  definitions   of
and/or  rebellion  against definitions of  proper/improper
behavior.

     15.  People   are   preoccupied   with   appearances,
impressions, conformity and/or non-conformity.

     16.  People  are not familiar with healthy people who
are engaged in healthy intimate/sexual relationships.

     17.  People regard sexuality as a commodity, service,
product, tool or possession which may reasonably be owned,
used, controlled, sold, traded, or given away.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
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