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                                 %TIME FOR INTIMACY 771014

     Meaningful  intimacy  tends to occur only in  relaxed
situations  which  are  free  of  time  pressures.   Hasty
societies are likely to be relatively devoid of  intimacy;
its  members  will be unlikely to make time for  intimacy.
The  motivations  which  promote  haste  are  unlikely  to
promote  valuing  of  intimacy;  so  in  a  hasty  society
intimacy  is  not likely to be a high priority.  A   hasty
society is prone to  encourage  haste  in  transportation,
eating, communication, education, intimacy, contemplation,
and sexual relationships. In each instance haste occasions
perversions within that realm of life;  perversions  which
are  costly  in various ways---depending on the  realm  of
life involved, yet yielding unsatisfactory returns.

     Real  intimacy  occurs in the eternal now  of  I-Thou
relationships,    not   through  efficient   manipulations
according  to objective knowledge and skills in the  realm
of I-It relationships.  I-It relationships occur in space-
time  according  to  the  processes of  cause  and  effect
measurable  by meter sticks and clocks.  The time of  I-It
relationships is chronological and limited.

     I-Thou  relationships are known in the eternal now of
the proper time for their realization,  the kairos.    The
proper  time of I-Thou relationships is qualitative,   not
quantitative.   The proper time of I-Thou relationships is
not measured by chronometers clocks.  Even so,  people who
are time-conscious in the sense of chronometers are likely
to be too hasty to recognize the kairos for intimacy. They
are unlikely  to respect the kairos  for  intimacy  and so
unlikely  to step into I-Thou relationships  of  intimacy.
They  probably  do not know the eternal now of  meaningful
intimacy,   for they are always rushing from the past into
the  future  according to be beat of chronometers.   Their
lives  are governed by chromos,  not enlivened by  kairos.
They  do not recognize  the kairos for intimacy and so  do
not know each other intimately.

     Fearful people tend to fear intimacy and do not  want
to  recognize the kairos for intimacy.   They do not  have
relaxed role models whose life-style they might  followed.
Their  fear originates in the insecurity occasioned by the
lack  of intimacy in their childhood.   Their parents  did
not  recognize the kairos for intimacy,  even though  they
did engage in some sexual relationships.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
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