This-essay is a7609071.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %ESCAPING COLLUSIONS+760907 %HONEST PRAYER LOVING GOD 760907 When frustration leads to the suspicion that one is trapped in a collusion---it is difficult to verify that suspicion. Those whom one most trusts are likely to be participants in the suspected collusion; they will deny its reality, and threaten you for suspecting it. What is to be done to be helpful in such a situation? One may look for incongruities and inconsistencies in one's perceptions, understanding, values, and behavior. A collusion cannot have full integrity. No one can, with full being, participate in a collusion. All people intuitively are aware of values which transcend all collusions. Collusions place barriers between people. Instincts tell us that we are meant to be together and open towards each other. Collusions define inter personal relationships in rigid legalistic terms. Instincts point us towards loving relationships which are flexible so as to be suited to the needs of unique individuals. Collusions are arrogant. Instincts lead us to be attracted to people who are meek, humble, and unpretentious. Thus careful consideration of basic instincts can guide one toward identifying the incongruities and inconsistencies in one's own collusions. Within a collusion there are likely to be sensitive areas which are sources of frustration and anxiety to participants within the collusion. These are the areas where the collusion is most on the defensive and most likely to respond to attack in a violent way. Thus a frontal attack upon them is likely to be counter- productive. An appeal to values held within the collusion is likely to be more productive. By careful selection, positive values may be found within most collusions which may be nurtured in ways which will help break down the collusions---by promoting a greater degree of intellectual and emotional honesty and a search for real integrity. An appeal needs to be made to values which transcend those which call for the protection of the sources of frustration and anxiety. The idolatries of the collusion must be revealed in a loving way. The participants need help in feeling acceptable in a new light which reveals a new being. The shaking of the foundations of the collusion must not be so threatening in its emotional impact as to occasion the participants' attempt to strengthen those foundations. The participants need a new courage to be themselves with fear and trembling in a new freedom. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================
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