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%INTIMACIES HUMANE RELATIONS NOT ESSENTIALLY OBJECT 051101
%REJECTION ACCEPT TOLERANCE REFLECTION REVEAL GREED 051101
%MASK HIDE SECRET PRIVACY MUTUAL DESIRE SATISFY SEX 051101
%PLEASURE DESIRE FULFILL CONSUMMATE LOVER NEEDS GOD 051101
%UNITY TOGETHER INTEGRATIONS INTEGRITIES INTEGRATOR 051101
%MUTUAL RESPECT HONOR TRUST REVERENCE HOLY GRACEFUL 051101

     Intimacies   in   humane   relationships   are    not
essentially objective realities.

     Intimacies  in humane relationships  are  essentially
about mutually desired and satisfying dialogue between and
among  humane people who bond with each other through open
and  honest dialogue regarding what matters most to  them;
which is only rarely matter in the objective sense.

     True intimacies entail mutually agreed upon kinds and
levels of:  vulnerability,  privacy,  public-affirmations,
cooperation, interdependence, independence,  integrations,
integrities,  sharing, hospitality, civility,  generosity,
accomodations and reflections.

     Humane  intimate  relationships cannot be made to  be
"good"   by  people  who  are  outside  of  the   intimate
relationships, while trying to:  control,  guide,  manage,
dominate or profit-from any one relationship or pattern of
relationships.

     Humane   intimate  relationships  focus  to   varying
degrees upon different combinations of: friendships, work,
cooperation,   hobbies,  service,  academics,   religions,
spirits, beliefs, readings, music, poetry, entertainments,
covenants,   bondings,  affections,  emotions,  sexuality,
creativity, values, ideals, principles, goals, hopes, etc.

     Prescriptions,  proscriptions, prerequisites,  ideal-
forms, formulas, formalities,  commands, demands, morality
and other forms of domination and control are not the keys
to humane intimate relationships.

     Healthy:   hopes,  aspirations,   desires,   empathy,
visions, dreams,  sympathy and expectations play essential
roles in humane intimate relationships.   In their absence
there are few humane intimate relationships.

     Preoccupations with:   ideal-forms, unity,  forms-of-
conformity,  proprieties,  standard-expectations,   moral-
codes,  ethics, formalities,  agreements,  fears, threats,
etc.  ---  are foreign to humane  intimate  relationships,
their lives,  participants and their revelations.

                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in
                      "Search for Honesty and Integrity"
                    (On Being Yourself Whole and Healthy)

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