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%CONTROL DYSFUNCTIONAL SEXUAL EXPRESSIONS RELATIONS+991116
%KASAL WOMEN SEX ADDICTION SECRECY DISHONESTY TEMPT 991116
Thousands of years of human history are full of
examples of unsuccessful efforts to control dysfunctional
expressions of human sexual desires, fantasies, dreams and
visions. The efforts often seem reasonable in light of
the ways in which: dishonesty, disloyalty, deception,
disease, secrecy, selfishness, coercion, manipulations,
collusions, abuses, violence, extremism, and imbalance
--- have been associated with dysfunctional human
sexuality. We need to ask, however, how often the same
negative traits just named have been associated with human
efforts to control dysfunctional human sexuality?
Consider for example:
1. Dishonesty about people's ability to truly
control their sexual desires, fantasies, dreams and
visions. These reflexive realities can be influenced.
Is there any objective evidence that they can be truly
controlled? Where can the evidence be found?
Objective behaviors can be influenced; but is there any
objective evidence that they can truly be well
controlled? Where can the evidence be found?
2. The extent to which dysfunctional behaviors
related to addictions, human sexuality, and "intimate"
personal relationships, romance, and collusions are
intricately inter-related. See Kasal's book "Women, Sex
and Addiction."
3. Consider the pattern of correlation between
communities which repress expressions of physical
intimacy --- with communities which suffer unusually
high levels of violence. See Prescott's report in the
Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists in November of 1975.
4. Consider how humans' reluctance and/or inability
to deal openly and honestly with their sexual behaviors
led to inadequate and delayed efforts to deal with the
AIDS epidemic.
5. Consider how parents' reluctance and/or
inability to deal openly and honestly with their sexual
dispositions and behaviors have led generations of
uninformed adolescents to teach each other how to
become sexually involved with each other --- with
little parental guidance.
6. Consider how often religious groups have avoided
dealing openly and honestly with human sexuality in ways
which would provide adolescents with reliable factual
information about:
a. the risks of sexually transmitted diseases;
b. addictions associated with dysfunctional
sexual behaviors;
c. the risks of mixing drug-use with human
sexual activities;
d. the risks of beginning premature pregnancies;
e. the risks of creating premature sexual
bondings;
f. the risks of becoming vulnerable with sexual
partners who have not shown themselves to be
supportive, reliable, gentle, open, honest,
intelligent, disciplined, etc;
g. the risks of mixing collusions and sexuality.
7. Consider the dismal rate of success in dealing
with sexual prostitution and misleading
pornography.
8. Consider the reluctance of many religious leaders
to agree that family planning is essential in
bringing the population explosion under prudent
and honest controls.
9. Consider the consequences of segregating males
into all male-armies of sexually frustrated
males who are taught to be violent and abusive in
carrying out their official duties. What about
when they are then "off-duty"?
People who presume to respond prudently to
dysfunctional human sexuality need to be intentional in
seeking to transcend the dysfunctional traits which
characterize dysfunctional sexuality --- while they are
working on dealing prudently with dysfunctional human
sexuality. If they do not, there is a good chance that
they are playing collusive games of mutual self deception
which will undermine their honesty, prudence, and wisdom.
(c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in
www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty
(On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)
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