This is http://www.essayz.com/a9504051.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %INDEPENDENCE INTERDEPENDENCE FREEDOM FROM CONTROL+950405 %PARENT CHILD ADULT TEACHER PROFESSOR SCHOOL LOVE+950405 %TEACHER COLLEGE UNIVERSITY CHURCH RELIGION PREACH+950405 %REBEL ANGER VIOLENCE COERCION MANIPULATION ALIENS 950405 Often adolescents rebel against authoritarian controls and seek to be totally independent. Their kind of desires for total independence often pervade communities of people who have not out-grown adolescent rebellions against authorities who did not recognize or deal honestly with the differences between such reflexive realities as: alienation, rebellion, independence, inter-dependence and intimacy. Often it is authoritarian control which adolescents rebel against, but in their immature rebellion against authoritarian controls imposed by addictive people, immature adolescents seek to be totally independent--- because they have no healthy role models of honest inter- dependent adults. The authoritarian controls of addictive adults are not healthy; and it is healthy to rebel against such authoritarian control. Yet, it is not healthy to buy the myth that people can be totally independent in ways which are satisfying, meaningful and enduring. It is tragically dishonest and costly to buy that deadly myth. Healthy people grow up within interdependent relationships which are mutually satisfying. Unhealthy people grow rebellious within manipulative relationships preoccupied with issues of discipline and control---and are dominated by addicts and their codependent supporters who are playing collusive games of mutual self deception. Rebellion against such manipulative relationships is healthy---but such rebellion is often misguided in tragic ways which lead back into additional manipulative relationships. We also need to recognize, name, describe and talk about relationships and role models which are healthy examples of healthy interdependence---and to recognize, name, describe and talk about relationships and role models which are tragic examples of unhealthy manipulation, coercion, control, discipline, and authoritarian dominance. We need to recognize, name, describe and talk about tragic rebellion against unhealthy dominance by addictive people and their codependent supporters---so that we can transcend their life styles of evil dominance and alienation which engender tragic rebellion and so engender disintegrative feed-back loops in unhealthy relationships. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================