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 %DISINTEGRATIVE REFLEXIVE RELATIONSHIPS KINDS FAIL 950205

     The  following words are suggestive of disintegrative
personal relationships:

DISHONEST     DECEPTIVE     MISLEADING     ABUSIVE

COERCIVE      VIOLENT       MANIPULATIVE   CONTROLLED

REPRESSIVE    BLOCKED       SUPPRESSIVE    PUNITIVE

SADISTIC      AGGRESSIVE    VENGEFUL       REVENGEFUL

ALIENATIVE    REJECT        ARROGANT       TRAGIC


     It   is  tragic  when  personal   relationships   are
characterized  by words such as those above---when two  or
more people are involved in the relationships.

     It  is  not obvious that it is possible for  personal
relationships  to  be characterized by words such as those
above---when  there is just one human body involved.    We
are  prone to think that the above words are relevant only
when  there are two or more bodies.   We need to  consider
the  ways  in which the above words may  point  to  tragic
aspects  of the reflexive relationships between and  among
the  aspects  of  one person---embodied  within  just  one
physical body.

     In these considerations sharp boundaries often vanish
upon  closer examination---as in the close examination  of
fractal boundaries drawn on progressively magnified scales
by  computer programs on computer screens.   Even so,  the
appearance  of  boundaries  can  be  significant;    i.e.,
boundaries    between   somewhat   different   and   often
conflicting aspects of one person.

     When   the   above  tragic  list  of   words   points
significantly  to the nature of the relationships  between
somewhat  different  aspects of one person, they  point to
disintegrative   processes  which  may  spread  from   the
relationships  within  one person to relationships between
the  one  person and other persons.   It is  important  to
recognize  that  the words point to relationships in  each
instance;   not to entities devoid of relationships.   The
tragedies  pertain  to  relationships;  not  to  elements.
Dealing  with  elements  as  isolated elements  is  not  a
solution to the dilemma to which the tragic words point---
it  is  a symptom of the alienation to  which  the  tragic
words point.   Wisdom and love call for dealing openly and
honestly  with the tragic aspects of the relationships  of
alienation;   and  call for workers to work to heal  those
relationships in honestly reflexive ways.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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