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%EVIL DYNAMIC CAUSE EFFECT DISINTEGRATE SELF ESTEEM+921027
   %JUDGMENTAL REJECT EXCOMMUNICATE ACCEPT DIALOGUE 921027

     To  cope effectively with evil relationships we  need
to  understand  a little bit about the way in  which  evil
relationships  breed  additional evil relationships in  an
exponential  way;   i.e.,  in proportion to how many  evil
relationships already exist.

     It is relationships which are evil; not people.  Evil
is generated by (originates in)  alienative relationships;
not  so much by individual people.  The essence of evil is
relational,  not individualistic.  The essence  of evil is
alienation,   relational;  having to do with the  lack  of
communication,  connection,  integration---among the parts
of  a community---which may be the parts of a  person  who
has disintegrated due to the alienation within a community
of  many  persons.   Evil  has  to do  with  the  lack  of
communication,    connection,    and  integration   within
relationships; not with the presence of a foreign power in
a single person.

     If we believe that the presence of a foreign power in
a single person is the essence of evil; then we are  prone
to  reject single people whom we believe to be evil.   Our
belief  regarding  the nature of evil thus generates  evil
relationships and all the disintegration and terror  which
evil relationships bring to us.  To transcend the curse of
evil  we must transcend misleading beliefs  regarding  the
nature of evil;  and stop acting as if the essence of evil
could  reside  in a person as a foreign  power  making  an
individual  person  as an individual person into  an  evil
agent.

     What  is  to be feared is the disintegration  of  our
relationships;   not  the  power  of  any  person  who  is
perceived as an evil thing and who is thereby judged to be
worthy  of  being alienated;   rejected,   excommunicated,
shunned, disfellowshipped, ignored, banned, excluded, etc.
It  is our rejection of people whom we regard  as  evil---
which generates our evil relationships of alienation. Evil
relationships originate  in  rejections, excommunications,
shunning,   disfellowshipping;  in being  ignored,   being
banned,  and being  excluded.   Evil relationships  do not
usually originate  within  the individual  people  who are
judged  to  be  worthy  of rejections,   excommunications,
shunning,      and disfellowshipping.   Evil relationships
usually  originate  with  "good"   people  tolerating  and
perpetuating rejections,  excommunications, shunning,  and
disfellowshippings.

     The  more we focus our attention upon our definitions
of how we should think,  feel,  and behave in order to  be
good   people---upon   our  presumed  knowledge   of   the
difference  between good people and evil people---the more
prone  we are to make alienative  judgments,  and  so  the
more  prone  we  are to generate alienative  relationships
which are the essence for real evil.

     The  person  who  is  rejected by  the  rest  of  the
person's    community    is   excluded   from    essential
communications, connections,  and integration; that is the
essence    of    rejection---exclusion   from    essential
communications, connections and integration.  The rejected
person   usually   cannot  generate  self  esteem,    self
confidence,  and personal integrity.  We can generate self
esteem, self confidence and personal integrity only within
healthy  relationships.   We cannot generate them  as  the
prerequisites    to    being   accepted    into    healthy
relationships.   If we believe that we must generate  self
esteem,   self  confidence and personal  integrity  to  be
qualified to be accepted into healthy relationships---then
we  are trapped in truly evil relationships from which  we
cannot escape on our own.
     We need help which transcends us to be saved from our
misleading  beliefs  about the nature of "good people" and
"evil people".  We are dammed by our presumed knowledge of
the  difference between  "good people"  and "evil people";
just  as  were Adam and Eve in their original  mistake  in
eating  of the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of  Good
and Evil. The knowledge is misleading.

     We  need  to shift the focus of our attention to  the
quality of our relationships;  and do all that we know how
to do to improve the quality of our relationships  without
judgmental  regard for the quality  of the participants in
the  relationships.   When we focus our attention  on  the
latter the quality of our relationships disintegrate,  and
so do we.  When we focus our attention upon the quality of
our relationships, they become integrated---and so do we.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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