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      %RESPOND FAILURE TRAGEDY DEVIL CONFLICT ALIEN 920830

     The  quality  of  our lives and the  quality  of  our
communities  depend  greatly upon how WE  RESPOND  to  the
failures,  mistakes, tragedies,  evils and conflicts which
we encounter in our lives. Too often our response tends to
be to focus  our  attention upon  the failures,  mistakes,
tragedies, evils and conflicts---and upon those people and
circumstances  which  we regard as being  responsible  for
them.  Too rarely do we focus upon the character,   nature
and consequences of our own responses.  Too often we focus
upon  that which we cannot control and/or influence.   Too
rarely  do  we  focus  upon what  we  can  control  and/or
influence.

     Too  often  we  focus our attention upon  how  we may
justify our responses;  and upon the failures,   mistakes,
tragedies,   evils,   and conflicts which elicit  what  we
regard as our proper, natural and/or inevitable responses.
What  else can people expect of us!  How unreasonable  can
people be?

     If we reflect honestly upon our own circumstances  we
will  recognize  that  what we can most influence  is  the
character  and  nature of our own  responses  to  whatever
happens around us and to us.  We can change our own habits
of  thought,  assumptions,  and presuppositions;  our  own
attitudes.  We can learn  to  be  more  creative and  less
thoughtlessly reactive in our own responses.  We can learn
to help to resolve conflicts through charitable management
of  conflicts  so that conflicts are resolved; rather than
conflicts  continuing  to be occasions for  people  taking
positions,  choosing up sides and conflicting  armies---to
attack and destroy each other.

     If   we   can   learn  to  turn  our   attention   to
understanding  ourselves  reflexively and honestly we  may
learn  how  to  improve the character and  nature  of  our
responses in trying situations. We may learn to understand
and respond to each  other  sympathetically,   rather than
judgmentally and manipulatively.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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