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%FREEDOM CONSTRAINT LIBERATION ADDICT COLLUSION JOY 901113

When we think of freedom,  there is usually the thought of
possible  constraints which would limit our freedom.   The
freedom  to  do something,  is the freedom  from  whatever
might constrain us, so we would not be free to do whatever
it is that we wish to do.

Constitutionally  guaranteed  freedoms  are   governmental
guarantees  to  liberate  us from constraints  imposed  by
others  which  might  prevent us from doing  what  we  are
guaranteed we will be free to do. So it is with freedom of
speech, press, petition, assembly, and worship.

There are some kinds of freedom which cannot be guaranteed
by  governments  or by other people:  freedom  from  fear,
ignorance,   poverty,   sickness,   anxiety,   alienation,
addictions,    codependence,    collusions,     delusions,
dishonesty,  imperfections,  limitations,   manipulations,
conflict,   work,   hunger,   boredom,   misunderstanding,
confusion, etc. Some of the "benefits" which we may desire
cannot  be  assured or guaranteed.  Many  such  "benefits"
would  not really benefit us in the ways which we  imagine
that they might, were they assured to us.

There  are many occasions in which others cannot do for us
what  only  we can do for ourselves;  and there  are  many
occasions in which we cannot do for others, what only they
can  do for themselves.  No one can guarantee to  another,
the benefits which the other can enjoy only upon doing for
themselves,  what only they can do for themselves.  We are
fools  if we expect others to do for us,  what only we can
do  for  ourselves.   We are fools when we try to  do  for
others, what only they can do for themselves.

It  is  important  that we be for and supportive  of  each
other with our own true presence; but it is also important
that we know how to distinguish between  being for another
person   in   spiritually   supportive   affection,    and
inappropriately  trying to do for another person what only
they can properly do for themselves.

It  is  important that we not be confused  about  what  is
involved  in  others  being for us;  and what  we  in  our
confusion desire or expect others to do for us,  what only
we  can properly do for ourselves.  We need to be for  and
with  each  other  in authentic  presence  and  affection,
without desiring or seeking some dishonest substitute form
of being.

To be for somebody in supportive presence and affection is
not  to  substitute  our being,  in place of  their  being
authentically themselves. To be for somebody in supportive
presence  and  affection is not accomplished by  means  of
techniques,   technologies or systematic procedures.  Such
being  is  not a technical achievement in the  process  of
solving a technical problem.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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