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  %ADULT VICTIM OF CHILDREN'S RECORDED INSTRUCTIONS 900706

     Many  adults  are  victims of  uncritically  followed
recorded  instructions from the child of their past.   The
child came to conclusions on the basis of a child's logic,
emotions, data and morality; and recorded the instructions
for  future reference to deal with future situations,   to
which  according  to  the child's  thought  processes  the
instructions might pertain.

     The  child came to the conclusions in the context  of
trying  circumstances.   The recorded messages have to  do
with how to survive when dealing with manipulative adults,
violent superiors, dishonest behavior, absent parents, and
with people unable to give support and affectionate  love,
because they have none to give,  because they had received
none. The messages often have to do with impotence and how
to gain power in a child's way.

     The child had to hide the conclusions from adults, so
the  child  recorded the messages in ways  which  were/are
hidden  from adult view,  and were/are hard for adults  to
discover  and understand.  Now the adult is following  the
recorded  instructions uncritically,  because the adult is
unable  to consciously discover what the  child  recorded.
The  adult  of the child is subconsciously  following  the
recorded advice, and is unable to consciously evaluate the
propriety of the advice in terms of adult logic, emotions,
morality, and data.

     The adult of the child needs to get in touch with the
child who was out of touch with adults when the misleading
messages were recorded. The adult needs to feel with their
child  what  it was like in the child's context  when  the
messages  were  recorded,  and to mourn with the child  in
expressing  the  child's  unshared  grief  over  what  was
lacking and what was lost in unshared times of fear,  joy,
pain,  hope,  grief,  and anticipation.  Only then may the
adult  of the child be able to be honestly in  touch  with
the  messages from the past,  and to see clearly if  those
messages  are  today wise messages  in  today's  contexts.
Failing that, the adult may be bound to subconsciously and
compulsively  obey  the messages from  the  adult's  inner
child  of  today  who is still out of touch  with  today's
realities.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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