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  %RESCUE CODEPENDENT GUILT SERENITY PEACE TRANQUIL 890408

     The  codependent does not know how to be  comfortable
with  peace,   tranquility and serenity.   In  fact,   the
codependent  often  feels  guilty  in  moments  of  peace,
tranquility and serenity. After all, there are many people
who do not have such luxuries; and it is not right for the
codependent  to enjoy such luxuries when there are  others
who do not have them.

     In the face of such contrast the codependent is bound
to feel guilty,  and seek ways to deal with the guilt. The
codependent's addict is always willing to help in  dealing
with  such guilt,  and can readily provide a crisis  which
will  get rid of the guilt which the codependent does  not
know  how  to  deal  with.  Thus does  the  addict  endear
himself/herself to the codependent in times of need.

     The  codependent is trapped in  codependent  personal
relationships because the codependent does not know how to
make responsible use of peace, tranquility and serenity as
occasions  for recreation which can be the foundation  for
really resolving conflicts;  rather than playing collusive
games  of  mutual  self deception within  conflicts.   The
codependent  needs to learn how NOT to feel  guilty  about
peace,   tranquility  and serenity;  they are the keys  to
creative living,  not occasions for guilt.  Honest service
and  love  are impossible without peace,  tranquility  and
serenity.

     The  codependent  needs  to learn  to  pray  for  the
integrity which is at the roots of peace,  tranquility and
serenity;   and through which the challenges of  addictive
and  codependent relationships can be met with  equanimity
in  creative ways.  Such integrity is not something  about
which one needs to feel guilty;  nor is it something which
one  can  keep  as  one's  own.   Integrity  is  not  real
integrity, unless it is known within sharing relationships
which demonstrate peace, serenity and tranquility.

     The codependent need not pay for peace,   tranquility
and  serenity through frantic efforts to be of service and
balance  the  books  of justification.  The  enjoyment  of
peace,   tranquility and serenity is its own justification
and  leads  to  salvation  from  frantic  works  of   self
justification.   It  is no crime to work  for  and  within
peace, tranquility and serenity; and to enjoy them in good
measure;   for  with  them  much human  suffering  can  be
alleviated even when technical efforts are impotent.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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