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                       %SELF ESTEEM STANDARDS ROOTS 870422

     Self  esteem  is rooted in personal  experiences  and
internalized  standards  by which self appraises  self  as
acceptable or rejectable in the eyes of people who matter.
Self  esteem  is rooted in both existential and  cognitive
considerations.   Any effort to improve self esteem  needs
to speak to both kinds of consideration.

     Self  esteem  is  likely to be low among  members  of
communities in which there are accepted standards in terms
of which to reject members of the community.   Self esteem
declines  when  standards  for  judgmental  rejection  are
accepted  in preference to the continued acceptance of and
inclusion  within  dialogue of those  people  who  do  not
conform  to prescribed standards  for  acceptability.  The
acceptance   of   any  system  of   judgmental   standards
undermines  the  personal  integrity  of  members  of  the
community, and so of the community as a whole.   It is not
the  choice  of any particular  standards  that  leads  to
disintegration;   it is the choice of a judgmental  system
which respects some set of conformal standards in terms of
which   to   excommunicate  members  of   the   community.
Excommunication  is  communal  disintegration.    Whatever
reduces communication through which integration may occur,
thereby promotes disintegration.

     People  who  suffer from low self esteem  rarely  are
well aware of the roots of their self rejection.   They do
not   have  the  confidence  to  engage  in   a   critical
examination  of the  standards by which they think  poorly
and feel  poorly about themselves.   Because of their  low
self esteem they can not  transcend the roots of their low
self esteem.   They can not help themselves.  They can not
control their own lives.

     The  macho criteria for self esteem says that  a  man
can  think and feel well regarding self only if he  is  in
control  of  some  woman.   The criteria is often  not  so
specifically directed  at women;  just be in some kind  of
control.    Control  may  be focused upon a  business,   a
political party, a government agency, military troops, spy
agency,    destructive   weapons,    information   agency,
disinformation agency,  etc.  It is important to recognize
how  it  is  that what people think  are  the  appropriate
standards for self esteem effect their particular behavior
patterns.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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