This-essay is a8306231.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %FEAR OF REJECTION-2 830623 It is hard to think and behave with integrity while fearing rejection by the persons and/or community which give contextual meaning to your life. Such fear diverts attention away from gaining a clear perception and understanding of the objective realities at hand; towards dealing with collusive realities, in keeping with the rules of the collusive games which: create them, will confirm their reality, and justify the fear which motivated dealing with them as real objective realities. Such fear of rejection confirms itself in the process of avoiding rejection. To transcend such fear one must be willing to find meaning outside the cycle of fear. To deal wisely with objective reality our vision must not be clouded by fear of rejection. We must learn that anybody who would reject us for failing to conform to some convention of propriety is not worthy of our respect, and so we should not fear their rejection. To learn such freedom we must know people who are committed to honesty and openness apart from conforming to standards of conventional propriety; people whose rejection need not be feared because they reject no person. To them rejection is an unacceptable tool of personal manipulation, for it undermines personal and communal integrity. Guilt is internalized fear of rejection. The person who feels guilty is rejecting self for having failed to conform to some standard of propriety. It is hard not to be fearful of rejection by the person closest to you, your own self. Guilt undermines personal integrity, and so undermines communal integrity. People who are prone to having guilt feelings find it difficult to deal wisely with real complicated situations which require clear vision which is not distracted by fear of rejection based upon conventional standards regarding how one should perceive, understand, feel, communicate, and find meaning in life. Rejection, threats of rejection, and guilt are evil in the sense that they promote alienation; the beak-down of personal and communal integrity. Evil is the absence of love which promotes personal and communal integrity. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================Lines beginning with a percent sign are KEYWORDS for use in ESSAY-System Searches. Their terminal digits are dates of writing in the format @yymmdd#, where @ = a means 99, @ = b means 20, and # = is a within-date essay-count. Links to date-adjacent essays are near page top & bottom.
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