This-essay is a8009051.htm which is available at the web-site www.essayz.com. See more notes at the bottom. Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay By-Months By-Years By-Words Webs of Like-&-Un-Like ESSAYS <==> Like-&-UN-Like This-One ========================================================== %RIGHT TO FRIENDSHIP SPACES PRIVACY 800905 Good friends grant each other the right to have friendship spaces. Friends do not demand of each other--- the right to other's presence upon demand. Presence is meaningful only if it is mutually desired. Mutuality cannot be demanded; at least not in a meaningful way. There must be letting-go for being together to be revitalized. Friends positively need to be apart, sometimes for extended lengths of time. Only with distance can new perspectives and new significance come to the friendship. The right to friendship spaces is not conditional upon offering a good reason. The need for a friendship space is violated if it must be explained. No explanation is a good explanation. Both ways of taking the last statement can be meaningful. Friends do not have a right to an explanation for the other's need for a friendship space. The need for such an explanation violates the friendship, although the person feeling the need is likely to feel that the violation of the friendship is occasioned by the refusal to meet the felt need. Such violence can be transcended only by people who come to respect the right to friendship spaces. The right to friendship spaces is not a legal right in the sense of other legal rights. If viewed strictly in legalistic terms the right is likely to be violated even by those who seek to defend it. Friendship rights are not sustained in legalistic ways; friendships are not helpfully sustained by prescriptions, duties, obligations, etc. Social conventions often occasion the violation of the right to friendship spaces. Social conventions often demand that friends be together when they need spaces. People will wonder what is wrong with friendship if the friends fail to be constantly together. Gossip starts if friends are seen with other than their customary partner. Too often people assume that a friendship space means that the friendship has been violated, and investigations are undertaken to determine who is guilty of violating the friendship. Such investigations violate the right of friends to friendship spaces. Such violations of the rights to privacy tend to undermine the richness of friendships. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in www.essayz.com Search for Integrity and Honesty (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================
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