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  %CONTRAST DIFFERENT DOMINEERING PEOPLE TRUE LOVER 041001
%CONTESTS INFLUENCE CONTROLS MANAGEMENT THREAT PAIN 041001
%PUNISH ATTACK WAR DESTROY DISINTEGRATE INTEGRITIES 041001
%EXCLUDE BLOCK EXCOMMUNICATE DIALOGUE VIOLATE DEVIL 041001
 %TRUE LOVERS PATTERNS CIVILITY COOPERATE INCLUSIVE 041001

    The  contrast  between Domineering-People  and  True-
Lovers  can  be  noted  in  terms  of  contests  regarding
"influence":

     1.  Domineering   people  often  try  to  reduce  the
"influence"  of complementary people whom they regard as a
threats to their own "influence".    Domineering  people's
"influence"   is  often  exercised  through  efforts   to:
exclude,   denigrate,   block,   excommunicate,   violate,
disintegrate,  kill,  etc.  "their enemies".   The natural
consequences of such efforts include many tragic occasions
of personal and communal disintegration.

     2.  True  Lovers of try to integrate the patterns  of
"influence"   of complementary people whom they regard  as
inherently  essential  members of  the  community.    True
Lover's "influence" is often exercised through efforts to:
include,  reconcile, heal, listen-to, be-in-dialogue-with,
enliven, and cooperate with "different" other people.  The
natural consequences of such efforts include may  gracious
occasions of personal and communal integration.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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