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   %EXPERIMENTAL UNILATERAL EXPERIMENTS FRIENDSHIPS 040121
  %INTIMATE SEXUAL EVIL RELATIONSHIPS IRRESPONSIBLE 040121
   %ARROGANCE SELF RIGHTEOUSNESS CERTAINTY ABSOLUTE 040121
 %INVITATIONS SEDUCTIONS HOSPITALITY EXPERIENCES IT 040121
 %I-THOU BUBER UNDERSTANDING GROWTH BIRTH DEATHS GO 040121

     It  is irresponsible for young people to UNILATERALLY 
experiment  with  forming  new  friendships  and  intimate 
sexual  relationships.   Healthy friendships and  intimate 
sexual relationships are NOT FORMED UNILATERALLY; they are 
always formed GENTLY AND COOPERATIVELY. 
  
     It is irresponsible for young people to  UNILATERALLY 
claim  to  know  with  certainty  just  how  to  form  new 
friendships and intimate sexual relationships.  So also it 
is  irresponsible  for mature people to UNILATERALLY claim 
to  know  just  how to tell young people UNILATERALLY  how 
they must behave UNILATERALLY in order to form healthy and 
well integrated  new  friendships   and   intimate  sexual 
relationships.   In such domineering efforts arrogance and 
self-righteousness   about-ideal-forms   of   friendships, 
intimacy and sexuality ---  lead to personal  and communal 
dis-integration. 

     When  we  are trying to do what we  have  never  done 
before  we are inevitably experimenting.   Experimentation 
is inevitable in living new lives.   In healthy new humane 
relationships  experimentation is inevitable,    essential 
AND  COOPERATIVE.    
     
     Young people need wise and prudent guidance about how 
to enter into healthy new humane relationships. Such  wise 
and prudent guidance is  NEVER  UNILATERAL;   it is always 
cooperative,   humble  and  gentle.  ---   Those  who  are 
involved    in  such  wise  and  prudent   guidance    are  
entering  into  new  and  experimental  relationships  and 
dialogue about intimate experimentation;   e.g.,  as young 
parents  and even younger children.    How  often  do  new 
parents  and  their young  children remember having talked 
together  (been  in open   and   honest  dialogue)   about   
new    experimental friendships and sexual intimacies  for 
the first time? 
     
     When   guidance   is  UNILATERAL,   COERCIVE   and/or 
DOMINEERING  ---  the "guidance"  leads tragically to  the 
formation of new patterns of UNILATERAL,  COERCIVE  and/or 
DOMINEERING   inhumane  relationships  which   are   evil-
relationships;    and  so  lead  cyclically  to  lives  of 
arrogance,   self-righteousness,  and UNILATERAL-VIOLENCE.  
So on to endless conflicts and wars. 
      
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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