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 %MEANINGFUL SIGNIFICANT LOVE INTIMACY DIALOGUE SEX 030608
%LISTEN SHARE GENEROSITY ACCEPT HOSPITALITY WELCOME 030608
  %GIVING GETTING TAKING STEALING COERCION VIOLENCE 030608
   %ABUSE RAPE WAR TERRORISM TERRORISTS HOLY RIGHTS 030608
 %RITES RITUALS FORMALITIES CONFORMITY COMMANDMENTS 030608
  %PRESCRIPTIONS PROSCRIPTIONS DEMANDS REQUIREMENTS 030608

     Meaningful  and significant love OFTEN entails  being
willing in principle to:

     1.  Take the risk of  being vulnerable to domineering
people  who are usually ready,  willing and able to  take-
advantage-of (abuse)  information which  is made available
in open and honest dialogue.

     2.  Accept "different"  people into open  and  honest
dialogue;   rather than usually hiding within the confines
of exclusive clubs.

     3.  Take  the  risk  of being in Love with people who
are  ill-at-ease   and  dis-eased ---   because  they  are
poor,   dis-advantaged, rejected, isolated, etc.

     4.  Intentionally  let go  of  "the-power-to-control"
the   course   of  the  development  of  our  increasingly
intimate relationships.

     5.  Have  one's  own collusive games of  mutual  self
deception  exposed to the light of open and honest  public
dialogue   ---   which  may  focus  upon   whatever disin-
tegrative behaviors one is engaged in.

     6.  Have  ulterior/hidden motives exposed  to  public
view.

     We   need to acknowledge publicly that the above   is
true  of   meaningful  and significant  demonstrations  of
love;  including sexual love.   Sexual abuse,  rape,   and
addictive/codependent    marital-relationships  ---    are
not  meaningful  or significant  demonstrations  of  love.
Sexual   relationships   are   NOT  inherently  evil  just
because   they  are sexual.   What we refer to as  "sexual
abuse" is not truly "sexual" in any meaningful way.

     Confusion  in  these  areas  of  human  knowledge  is
encouraged by domineering people who are "in the  service"
of  "The  Domination System".    Keeping people  ignorant,
confused,  and fearful ---  serves the "special interests"
of "The Domination System"  ---  because doing so seems to
make  people  easier  to:  manage,   mis-lead and control.
Encouraging  people to believe that they can know  who  is
"good" and who is "evil" helps "The Domination System" ---
because  such presumed  knowledge  promotes:   alienation,
estrangement, misunderstandings,   confusion,   prejudice,
doubts,   suspicion,   and  keeps  people  "off  balance";
presumably easier to control/manage.  Of course, when "The
Domination System"   is in control, "things" are often not
what they seem to be!

     Why  do  domineering people often promote the  false-
notion that "sex" is inherently "evil";  i.e., why do they
promote the notion  that  sexual  relationships  are to be
avoided/minimized whenever possible?

     1.  Profound love  exposes DISHONESTY which is one of
the  prime/essential  tools of  "The  Domination  System".
Healthy  sexual  relationships entail profound love  which
threatens "The Domination System".

     2.  Profound  love subverts excessive  concentrations
of  power   and preoccupations  with  issues  of  control;
two   important   tools   of  "The   Domination   System".
Healthy  sexual relationships entail profound  love  which
threatens "The Domination System".

     3.  Profound  love motivates  and  guides  people  to
learn new lessons, to change, and to  grow.  Only traitors
to  our dominant cause would do any of  those  unthinkable
things!

     4.  True-lovers never seek to "win" at the expense of
others  who are "losers".   Only traitors  would  tolerate
such   a  dangerous letting go of our essential   defenses
and our control mechanisms.

     5.  Truly  domineering    people   are   compulsively
preoccupied  with always being "in control"  and "winning"
conflicts  at  the  expense of "losers"  who are  not  "in
control".    That  is how we should be "in  control"   and
always "winners"!
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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