This is http://www.essayz.com/b0302131.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %CONTRAST RESPONSE HEALTHY INTIMACY LOVERS SEXUAL+030213 %RESPONSE COO RELATION PROBABILITY CONNOTATION GOD+030213 %BRING TOWARD TEXT SCRIPTURE RELATIONSHIPS CONTROL+030213 %REVERENCE DENIGRATIONS AWE LOATHING FEAR RESPECT+030213 %HONOR CONTENTIOUS GOOD EVIL GENTLE COERCION WILL+030213 %VIOLENCE KEEPING SCORE RAGE ANGER TERROR PEACE 030213 The following two columns of words point to some of the contrasting responses of people to healthy: intimacy, love, sexuality and associated pleasures. People who respond in a way indicated on the LEFT --- are likely to respond in other ways indicated on the LEFT; but not as likely to respond in the ways indicated on the RIGHT. People who respond in a way indicated on the RIGHT --- are likely to respond in other ways indicated on the RIGHT --- but not as likely to respond in ways indicate on the LEFT. We need to keep in mind that the connotations which come to our minds when we read one of the words below --- may not be the same connotations which come to other people's minds upon reading the same word. What we discern upon reading a text --- often depends significantly upon what we bring to the text. Because we are different --- we discern different "things" when we read the "same" text. We are often ambivalent and oscillate back and forth between responses on opposite sides of the listing below. Only very few people always respond in ways that are characterized on only one side below. Different encounters elicit contrasting responses; often in inconsistent ways. Consistency is not one of the primary human characteristics. INTEGRATIVE RESPONSES DISINTEGRATIVE RESPONSES ===================== ======================== reverence denigrations awe loathing respect fear honor contentiousness good evil gentleness coercion support repression patience violence grace-full-ness keeping-score tranquility rage-full-anger humility judgementalism reconciliation revenge/vengefulness temperance terrorism liberation controls meekness domination balance extremism inclusion exclusion complementing exclusivity acceptance rejection enthusiasm dejection/depression dialogue excommunication comfort attack relaxation tension satisfaction destruction righteousness self-righteousness reconciliation segregation friendships alienation integration dis-integration mutuality unilateralism invitations commandments role-modeling legalisms forgiveness judgementalism assistance punishments spontaneity formalities intimacies technologies hospitality terror civility embarrassment being-together being-against cooperation separation discernment fragmentation shalom panic/despair prayer demands honoring manipulations honesty pretentiousness liberation collusive-games clarification obsfucations assistance resistance authenticity repression responsiveness secrecy sharing with-holding It is a challenge to find and create ways to encourage responses pointed to on the left above; helping people to transcend responses pointed to on the right; while ourselves not responding in ways pointed to on the right. If we role-model the behaviors pointed to on the right above --- we encourage people to follow our role- modeling. If we role-model the behaviors pointed to on the left above --- with gracious consideration of others who may be threatened by our role-modeling --- we may encourage more people to role-model the helpful responses pointed to on the left above. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================