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   %INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS INTEGRATIVE HEALTHY+021129
 %JOYFUL ESSENTIAL FOUNDATIONS DEMONSTRATIONS ROLES+021129
   %MODELS COMMITMENTS GENTLENESS HUMILITY PATIENCE+021129
 %AUTHENTICITY BALANCE MUTUALITY RESPONSIVE RESPECT+021129
    %LISTEN TOLERANCE DIALOGUE CIVILITY HOSPITALITY+021129
 %SHARING GENEROSITY APPRECIATE THANKSGIVING ACCEPT 021129
                                                          
     Our interpersonal relationships are                  
      integrative, healthy and joyful ---                 
                                                          
       only to the extent that we build them cooperatively
        upon essential foundations which include ---      
                                                          
         demonstrations of real commitments to:           
                                                          
          gentleness, humility, patience;                 
                                                          
           honesty, authenticity, balance;                
                                                          
            mutuality, responsiveness, respect;           
                                                          
             listening, tolerance, dialogue;              
                                                          
              civility, hospitality, inclusiveness;       
                                                          
               peacemaking, reconciliation, healing;      
                                                          
                sharing, generosity, appreciation;        
                                                          
                 giving, thanksgiving, acceptance;        
                                                          
                  and mutually beneficial honesty within  
                                                          
                   all efforts toward conflict-resolution;
                                                          
                    as regards our high ideals and values.
                                                          
     In   the  absence  of  the  above  kinds  of   mutual
commitments  ---  we are likely to focus our attention  on
misleading questions such as:                             
                                                          
         Who among us is:                                 
                                                          
     1.  best, superior or purist?                        
     2.  worst, inferior or most expendable?              
     3.  doubtful, disloyal, or the traitor among us?     
     4.  unreliable, weak, or not conforming properly?    
     5.  most properly in-control, or out-of-control?     
     6.  most reliable and likely to conform properly?    
     7.  most acceptable or rejectable?                   
     8.  unwilling to conform properly/enthusiastically?  
     9.  most the embodiment of our thoughtless desires?  
    10.  most willing to sacrifice themselves for us?     
    11.  best at our collusive mutual self-deception game?
    12.  best at deceiving/misleading our enemies?        
    13.  best at destroying our enemies?                  
    14.  best at coercion and violence toward others?     
    15.  best at identifying the traitors among us?       
    16.  best at celebrating our addictions with us?      
    17.  least likely to expose our dishonesty/failures?  
    18.  least likely to subvert our self-deception game? 
    19.  least likely to undermine/spoil our narcissism?  
    20.  least likely to tell the truth about us?         
    21.  most vulnerable and usable --- to our advantage? 
                                                          
     Should we ask and think about the above questions?   
                                                          
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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