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%LONG TERM RELATIONSHIPS INTIMACIES SEXUALITY SERVE+020513
  %LACK BALANCE ABSENCE PRESENCE ACCOMMODATE DEMAND+020513
%FAIL FALL UNJUST ASSUMPTIONS FALSE PREMISES CHANGE+020513
%POWER CONCENTRATION CORRUPTION DISINTEGRATION GOOD+020513
 %FAMILY SECRETS ADDICTIONS CODEPENDENCE SUPPORTERS 020513
                                                          
     Tragic trouble/conflicts will come when two people   
       enter into a presumably long-term relationship     
         which LACKS BALANCE as to the exercise of        
           power and/or duties; e.g. to serve and         
             accommodate to the needs of another;         
               in an intimate friendship,                 
                 sexual relationships, or a               
                   formal marriage.                       
                                                          
     Such presumably long-term relationships often fail   
       because they have been founded upon unjust-        
         assumptions and/or false-premises; e.g.,         
                                                          
     1.  One partner is to have the most power.           
     2.  One partner is to be the most accommodating.     
     3.  One partner will not change, the other must.     
     4.  The nature of the relationship will not change.  
     5.  The partners will not change as they age.        
     6.  Religious beliefs/convictions will not change.   
     7.  The partners will not be intimate with others.   
     8.  The partners will always keep "family secrets".  
     9.  Only one partner can be domineering, not both.   
    10.  One partner must be in control of the other one. 
    11.  A collusive-game-of-mutual-self-deception is God.
    12.  Addictive needs are met by the codependent other.
    13.  "Family secrets" are never talked about.         
    14.  Certain questions must never be asked/considered.
    15.  True relationships conform-to/meet others' needs.
                                                          
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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