This is http://www.essayz.com/b0201063.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %HUMILITY ARROGANCE PEACEMAKERS CONFLICT RESOLVE+020106 %MISLEADING IDEALS VALUES PRINCIPLES SUPERIORITY+020106 %COMPETITION COOPERATION INTIMATE GOODNESS FAILS 020106 Often our RELATIONSHIPS are defective because of what is LACKING in, ABSENT from, our RELATIONSHIPS. Sometimes our RELATIONSHIPS are defective because we are EXCLUSIVE in how we define what is important; we focus more on WHO must be EXCLUDED, than upon the qualities of our RELATIONSHIPS. It is often harder to recognize WHO and WHAT is absent from our lives; than to recognize WHO and WHAT it is that troubles us, embarrasses us, and/or irritates us. To improve our RELATIONSHIPS we need to make time out for discerning WHAT and WHO is missing from our RELATIONSHIPS; the ways in which we are being exclusive in our patterns of living and relating. The following key words may be suggestive: TOLERANCE LISTENING GENTLENESS BALANCE RECREATION HUMOR GENEROSITY DIVERSITY COOPERATION CREATIVITY CONFIRMATIONS DIALOGUE LAUGHTER HUMILITY REST RELAXATION VULNERABILITY INTIMACY AFFECTION PLEASURE CURIOSITY FRIENDSHIPS NOVELTY AUTHENTICITY HONESTY OPENNESS TRANSPARENCY CIVILITY HOSPITALITY MODERATION MODERATORS HEALERS FORGIVENESS APOLOGIES RECONCILIATION PEACEMAKERS DIPLOMATS SHARING EMPOWERMENT LEARNING GIFTING Often we and others believe (and act as if) we can be "good" and enjoy "good" RELATIONSHIPS by affirming a few "key" beliefs and performing a few "key" rituals; regardless of all of the above which are absent from our personal and communal lives. Such beliefs and pretense tragically undermine both our personal and our communal integrities. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================