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   %TECHNICAL OBJECTIVE REFLEXIVE RELATIONS SUCCESS+980802     
  %PLAN SYSTEM PROCEDURE OUTCOME MEANS ENDS SATISFY+980802              
  %MEANING SIGNIFICANCE INTIMATE SEXUAL BOND PRISON 980802
                                                                                                                               
     The  technician  who  is  accustomed  to  planning  a                                                  
technical  project/procedure and carrying it  successfully              
to  completion according to plan through careful attention                                
to  details and faithfulness to good plans  and  technique                                                  
---    is  likely to find it frustrating to expect similar                                                                     
successful  outcomes  in personal relationships.       The                                                              
technician  may not  recognize  the fundamental  ways   in      
which    personal   relationships   are  unlike  technical                                                  
projects  and procedures ---   where  plans,   techniques,              
details, and control are essential.                  
                                                                                                                               
     With  regards  to personal   relationships   no   one                                 
person     can  successfully   project  the   outcome   of                                                                 
technical  procedures carried  to  completion in trying to              
control the relationships.  Personal  relationships  often                                                           
cannot  be completed according to any  plan.     Exclusive               
attention    to  technical  details  may   undermine   the                                                  
integrity of  the relationships.  Preoccupation with plans                                                              
and techniques is likely   to   undermine the integrity of                                                  
relationships.   Preoccupation  with issues of control  is                                                           
bound  to  imprison  the  person   preoccupied  ---    and                                                                 
perhaps  will  imprison others as well.                                                               
                                                                                                                               
     In  personal  relationships even if the  relationship                                                              
develops according to somebody's plan ---   it is unlikely                                                                     
that  such a success will yield to satisfaction which  was                                                                     
sought  and/or anticipated.       Personal   relationships                                                              
are     reflexive;   rather    than   objective.       The     
outcomes    of    reflexive  processes  are   not   purely     
objective,  and cannot be fully  controlled like objective                                                        
processes   can   be  fully  controlled.       People  who              
assume,    think,   or  believe  otherwise  are  likely to             
experience tragic outcomes of their misguided efforts.                                   
                                                                                                                               
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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