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%MEANING VALUE SIGNIFICANCE LIVES LIFE RELATIONSHIP+980114                                                 
  %CONNECTION OPEN HONEST DIALOGUE TALK LISTEN GOOD+980114                                                                  
%VULNERABLE INTIMACY DISCONNECT ALIENATION EVIL SIN+980114                     
%RISK TRUST LOVE INTIMACY SEXUAL DEFENSE VULNERABLE+980114
  %INTEGRITY HEALTHY HEALTH RECOVERY RECONCILE LOVE 980114                                           
                                                                                                                               
     The meanings and significances of human lives are not                                            
defined by abstract statements,  symbols,  and assertions;                                                                     
but rather by participation in open and honest  dialogues                           
which are mutual with shared power.    People who are  not                            
involved in, present within,  open and honest dialogue ---                             
do not live lives characterized by meaning,  significance,                                                                     
health and satisfaction.  They are not valued because they                          
are  not  known by others.    Because  they are not  known                   
intimately by others, they are vulnerable.                     
                                                                                                                               
     It  is  risky  to  be involved  in  open  and  honest                                                                  
dialogue  because such dialogue reveals truths about  self                          
which  may  be  abused  by  manipulative  people  who  are                                                                    
preoccupied with issues of control.                                                           
                                                                                                                               
     It  is  also  risky NOT to be involved  in  open  and                                                                     
honest  dialogue  because  being  absent  from  all   such                          
dialogue leaves one with no one who cares if one is abused                                                                     
through  manipulation by people who are  preoccupied  with                                
issues  of  control ---   without  defenders,   advocates,                                                           
healers, nurture and support in times of distress.                                                                             
                                                                                                                               
     Thus,  we cannot avoid risk by avoiding participation                           
in open and honest dialogue wherein we can find people who                                                                  
we can  trust---and who will care about being  involved in                                                             
meaningful relationships with us.  We cannot avoid risk by                                                              
avoiding honesty; for the more we avoid honesty---the more                                                                  
dishonest  people  there  are around us  willing  to  take                                                                  
advantage of us and abuse us ---  and  the fewer there are                                                                     
who care about us and who are willing to be supportive  of                                                                     
us and our own integrity.                   
                                                                                                                               
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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