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   %EXCLUSIVE COMMITMENT PROMISE MARRIAGE INCLUSIVE+960327
  %SHARP BOUNDARY AMBIGUITY TOLERANCE PARADIGM LOVE 960327

     Exclusive  people often operate on the principle that
the  significance  of a commitment or  promise  is  to  be
measured  in terms of what or whom is excluded because  of
the  commitment---but  rarely do they  focus in a positive
way  upon  what  or  whom  is  included  because  of   the
commitment.

     To  exclusive people the important questions have  to
do with drawing boundaries between themselves as worthy of
acceptance---and others as unworthy of acceptance.  People
who  do not make exclusive commitments are often  regarded
as  untrustworthy  and not worthy of acceptance---for they
are  not  operating  under  the  terms  of  the  exclusive
paradigm.    If  someone  is not clearly and unambiguously
loyal to  "the cause"   they are probably critics of  "the
cause" and in fact may be opponents of "the cause".

     Exclusive  people are not very tolerant of ambiguity.
They  like sharply drawn lines; and questions which can be
answers "yes"  or "no"  with no qualifications.   You  are
either for "the cause" or you are against "the cause". You
cannot trust  people  who try to sit  on the fence between
"right" and "wrong"; or between "good" and "evil."

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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