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   %VULNERABLE VICTIM ROLE ABUSE ADDICT CODEPENDENT 951201

     There is a dilemma in regards to being vulnerable.

     1.  We cannot be secure people of integrity in secure
communities of integrity without being vulnerable.    True
security entails the freedom to be vulnerable.   If we are
always   defensive  we  disintegrate  as  persons  and  as
communities.

     2.  There  are  many addictive people  who  interpret
other  persons  who  are  willingly vulnerable  as thereby
making statements that they are willing to play the victim
role. Addictive people often interpret vulnerability as an
invitation to them engage in abuse;  i.e., "Let us act out
the   addictive  codependent  drama,   with  you   playing
'dominant'  and  me playing 'subservient'."    Such people
often believe that  they have the right to play "dominant"
and that others have been destined to pay "subservient".

     Such  tragic  role-playing will not end  so  long  as
people  are  trapped  in  the  pattern  of  disintegrative
assumptions, attitudes, beliefs, convictions,  and rituals
within which they themselves seem to be normal,   natural,
proper  and respectable.    To  transcend such tragic role
playing we need to search for integrity and honesty.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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