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%AVOID PERSONAL BOND LOYALTY SEX EXCLUDE OWN FRIEND+931218
 %CONTROL OBEY OBJECTIVE REFLEXIVE PROFESS DISTANCE+931218
 %STUDENT PROFESSOR TEACHER TOUCH VULNERABLE REJECT 931218

     Often  professionals  in  efforts  to avoid  bias and
improper   relationships  with  clients,   customers   and
students  become  so distant that they do not  meet  those
with  whom they work.   It is not a simple matter to avoid
bias.    The effort to avoid bias can itself lead to  some
very   depersonalizing  forms  of  bias  which   undermine
integrative personal relationships.

     Technocratic  rules  which are presumed  to  properly
prescribe  good behavior and justify rejections  of  those
people   who  do  not  properly  conform   to   prescribed
behaviors---are  rules  which often lead to rejections and
alienation;  and so to the opposite of that which they are
presumed  to be able to achieve through proper respect and
observance of them.

     The  diligent avoidance of personal bonding and hints
of  possible sexual relationships often leads to the  lack
of  any  personal interest in those people who  are  being
kept  at a safe distance.   They become objects which  are
manipulated at a safe distance in I-It relationships,  not
real  persons with whom there is any bond or loyalty in I-
Thou  relationships.    At a safe  distance  there  is  no
touching  and no vulnerability---and so there  is  freedom
from the possibility  of  rejection  and  real  meaningful
relationships.    In  the  absence   of   real  meaningful
relationships    abstract   considerations,    fear    and
selfishness   tend  to  be  the  motivating  and   guiding
considerations which dominate impersonal behaviors.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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