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     %HUMAN RELATION CONFLICT VIOLENCE ACCEPT BASIS+931204
  %WHOLE PERSON DIALOGUE FRIEND INTIMATE LOVE TRAIN+931204
  %ANGER RESENT REVENGE RETALIATE DESTROY CROWN MOB 931204

     The  character  of  our  human  relationships  depend
critically upon the bases in terms of which we accept each
other person into our relationships.

     1.  As a whole person into honest dialogue?

     2.  As an object to analyze, predict, control?

     3.  As a puzzle to be solved?

     4.  As a challenge to our manipulative skills?

     5.  As a resource to be used and manipulated?

     6.  As en employee to train, discipline, punish?

     7.  As a team member or competitor with/against us?

     8.  As someone to convert to our point of view?

     9.  As a threat, enemy, adversary?

     The  nature  of our relationships  depend  critically
upon how and with what attitudes,  convictions, beliefs we
approach each other.  Our human relationships can never be
truly  objective  realities to be  analyzed,   understood,
predicted, manipulated and controlled as with objects.  If
we believe otherwise our failures will ultimately prove us
wrong in our inability to survive in environments where we
fail to deal with dilemmas and problems appropriately.

     If  we  approach  each other inappropriately  we  are
likely to become frustrated,  angered and resentful of our
failures  and blame others for our own failures;   and  so
take  out our anger upon others.   Thus we are  likely  to
develop  an exponential growth in dysfunctional  behaviors
which   will   destroy  whatever  integrity  we   and  our
communities may have previously enjoyed.   Mob  psychology
and crowd behavior are likely to dominate us and so we are
likely to fail to survive with integrity.   This has  been
demonstrated over and over in protracted civil  religious,
ethnic and international conflicts wherein people who have
approached   each   other  in  dysfunctional  ways   which
ultimately   become   violent  and  they   destroy   their
communities in angry expressions of their frustrations.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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