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   %SEEK GROUNDS EXCUSE MUTUAL ACCEPT REJECT MOTIVE+931002
          %EXCOMMUNICATE ALIENATE DISINTEGRATE EVIL 931002

     All  too  often we are motivated to seek grounds  and
excuses  for  mutual rejection,   excommunication,   fear,
apprehension,   etc.    The  assumptions,   attitudes  and
motivations   which  fuel  and  direct  such  efforts  are
essentially alienative,  disintegrative and evil---leading
us and others into personal and communal disintegration.

     We  need  more  often to seek grounds for and excuses
for mutual  acceptance,   dialogue,  listening, affection,
respect and cooperation.   The attitudes  and  motivations
which  can  fuel and direct such  efforts  are essentially
reconciling, integrative and Godly.

     To   be  healthy  and  enjoy  personal  and  communal
integrity we need to  encourage  the above latter kinds of
efforts, and to discourage the formation of contexts which
promote the above former kinds of efforts;  without at the
same time seeking to be fully in control of the  thoughts,
feelings,  desires,  attitudes,  fears or behaviors of any
person.

     So long as we seek to be in control for any reason we
are   bound  to  find  grounds  and  excuses  for   mutual
rejection,  excommunication,  fear, apprehension, etc.  as
means for being in control.  We are likely to regard being
in   control   as  justifying  the  associated  costs   in
alienation, disintegration and evil personal relationships
which  lead  us  and  others into  personal  and  communal
disintegration.

     We need more often to recognize and openly talk about
the fact  that the costs  of trying  to  be in control are
unacceptably   high   levels  of  personal  and   communal
disintegration    ---     due   to   mutual    rejections,
excommunications, fears,  apprehensions,  dis-eases,   and
the general  deterioration of our health and  programs  of
general health maintenance.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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