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 %INTEGRATE INTIMATE RELATION DIALOGUE SEX TALK JOY 930228

     The   integrative   natures   of   healthy   intimate
relationships  and  sexuality  are best understood  in  an
integrative  way which gives balanced consideration to all
aspects of such relationships; rather than in any analytic
way which places primary emphasis upon just one aspect, or
upon  just  a few aspects of the  relationships,   to  the
exclusion  of other key aspects.  To  pick  one aspect and
regard  it  as  the essence of  the integrative nature  of
healthy   intimate  relationships  and  sexuality---is  to
obscure, confuse and mislead.

     Healthy intimate relationships and sexuality  involve
people in relationships which have aspects to which we may
point with words such as: spiritual, open, honest, mutual,
balanced,  fair,  just,  responsive,  desirous,   relaxed,
physical,    psychological,    physiological,    security,
vulnerability, risking, trusting, meaningful, significant,
affirmative,  receptive,  accepting,  giving,  charitable,
loving,   and  erotic.   To be so analytic  as  to  become
preoccupied with that to which just one or a  few of  such
words   point   to,   is  to  destroy   healthy   intimate
relationships  and  sexuality.  To seek ways to  integrate
into  healthy whole communities all the realities to which
such  words point---to  is  to  promote  healthy  intimate
relationships and sexuality.

     To  helpfully  understand,  promote,   and  encourage
healthy intimate relationships and sexuality---we need  to
seek  to  understand  the  ways in which the realities  to
which  the  above words point are  inter-related  to  each
other   within   both  healthy   and   unhealthy  intimate
relationships  and sexuality.  Such understanding can best
be promoted by creating  communities  wherein  people  are
offered,   accept  and  enjoy  the  true  security   which
liberates  them  to be open  and  honest in  conversations
about  all of their experiences, perceptions,  beliefs and
convictions.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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