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This is http://www.essayz.com/a9212291.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %ATTITUDE JUDGE SUCCESS FAIL OWN OTHER CONTROL JOY 921229 What of our attitudes toward successes and failures; our own, and those of others? Much depends upon how we define successes and failures. Do we define them in terms of: whether we did what we intended to do? The effects of our efforts or the effects we intended to generate? Our degree of fulfillment/satisfaction or what we anticipated to enjoy? In other terms? Success and failure are reflexive realities at heart. We cannot define real successes or real failures entirely in objective terms with no associated reflexive aspects to our definitions. All successes and all failures entail both objective and reflexive aspects; efforts to pretend otherwise are dishonest efforts which will not succeed. We may fail because: 1. We generated foolish definitions of success and/or failure. 2. We were not well informed about preconditions, possibilities, obstacles, costs, impediments, oppositions, cause-effect relationships, impossibilities, etc. 3. We were trapped in collusive games of mutual self deception, addictions, codependencies. 4. We were not fully dedicated to the venture. 5. We did not make enough of an effort with enough resources. 6. Our best intentions were misguided in tragic ways. 7. Other people were determined to foil our efforts. 8. Unresolved conflicts within and among us prevented success. 9. We did not know how to recognize and enjoy success, or were not free to do so. 10. We tried to control what we cannot control. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================