This is http://www.essayz.com/a9211211.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %PLAN UNDERSTAND CONTROL PERSONAL RELATION COLLUDE 921121 If we feel that we must be in control of ourselves and each other in order to conform properly to requirements for acceptability; then we must be careful not to enter into intimate relationships which we do not yet understand and have not planned carefully. To be able to conform properly we must be able to anticipate the outcome of each relationship into which we enter. This requires a high level of understanding and planning prior to getting involved. If we are perceptive and encounter someone with the above attitudes and assumptions, we are bound to be suspicious and on the defensive. We will do all that we can so as not to be trapped in a manipulative relationship with such a person. We will do what we can to prevent such a person from getting a sufficient understanding of us to serve as the basis for manipulating us. We and they will be alienated from each other. We will seek to frustrate their efforts, and they are likely to be frustrated by us and others. They will live frustrated lives. In their frustration they are likely to become violent. We need to work to transcend the set of perceptions and patterns of assumptions characterized above. If we do not, we and our communities will disintegrate. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================