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 %FUNDAMENTAL CERTAIN BELIEF CONVICTION LISTEN LOVE 920223

     So  long as our most integrative intimacies are  full
of   doubts  and  insecurity  about  the  pleasures  found
therein---so  long  we  lack  integrity  as  regards   our
affective,   cognitive,  rational,  physical,  scientific,
personal,  communal and spiritual lives.  Those aspects of
our lives are not well integrated, and we are not well. We
are ill-at-ease,  because we are not at ease  in  our most
integrative pleasures.   We desperately  need to integrate
all aspects of our lives;  openly and honestly. We  cannot
be securely at  peace  and free from disintegrative doubts
until we do so.

     If  we  are  in disintegrative doubt about whether or
not  we  have  permission  from those who are nearest  and
dearest  to us  to enjoy our  most ingratiate and intimate
pleasures;  then we are not secure,  and we are  bound  to
react  defensively to any situation which we experience as
threatening  to us.  Our defensive reactions rob others of
their security,  and we all  become increasingly  insecure
and devoid of peaceful pleasures in exponential ways which
grow in proportion to our insecurity.

     We may react to our increasing doubts  by  increasing
our efforts  to  quell   the   doubts---through  fanatical
convictions, certainty, specialization, and narrow vision.
We  may  selectively  draw upon the  apparent  sources  of
security   in  our  past  beliefs  and  experiences;   and
construct  out  of  them  defenses  against  all  that  we
experience  as  threats  to our well being---all  that  we
experience  as  denying  us  any confidence  in  our  most
integrative   and   intimate   pleasures.   We may  become
fundamentalists    who   heighten   distinctions   between
themselves and those whom they perceive to be  the  enemy;
in  order to generate for themselves a cohesive  community
which  seeks  security  in  a  clearly  drawn  distinctive
identity  which is free from internal ambiguity,   doubts,
and   confusion.   Thus  are  laid  the  foundations   for
fundamentalist's collusions.

     Fundamentalists  play  collusive games of mutual self
deception about having  the  power to control and  banish:
doubts, insecurity, and imperfections---through collective
vigorous  efforts to  purify  their  beliefs, expressions,
convictions,  attitudes, feelings, emotions,  perceptions,
language,    minds,    bodies,    hearts,    spirits   and
relationships.   They seek security through  purification,
not through conflict resolution; through the repression of
doubts,   not  through open and honest  conversations  and
conversions;   through  shouting,  not through  listening;
through  excommunication,   not   through   communication;
through violence, not through gentleness.

     Fundamentalists  set  the  stage  for  the  growth of
insecure  communities  within  which most members  of  the
communities  have  reasonable doubts about whether or  not
they have the right, freedom, or permission to enjoy their
most integrative and  intimate  pleasures.   To survive we
must find ways to break  the  viscous  and violent  cycles
generated by  the  various  kinds  of fundamentalists  who
engender many  forms  of violence through their tragically
well intended efforts.

     It   is   not  only  overt   violence,    dishonesty,
excommunication,   and addictive behaviors which  engender
doubts and insecurity about enjoyment of pleasures  within
our most integrative intimate relationships. Doubts may be
engendered   by   the  lack  of   positive   affirmations,
affection,    attention,    acknowledgements,   listening,
dialogue, comfort, coherence, integrity and presence. When
affirmative  actions   and  communications  are reasonably
expected,   but  are  absent;   then  doubts,  insecurity,
defensiveness, and violence all grow together in  mutually
supportive ways.  To deal wisely with  all these realities
we  must learn  to  understand how they interact with each
other within us and our relationships.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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