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    %SEEK FIND KNOCK OPEN ASK RECEIVE ADDICT DEPEND 910213

     Codependents do  not ask for what they  really  need,
because they feel that they are not worthy to receive; and
so they do not receive from others what they need.

     Addicts do not ask for what they really need, because
they feel that it is  o.k.  to just take;  and so they  do
not receive gifts of any real meaning,  and find that what
they take is without  real meaning.

     Many people do not seek for what they   really  need,
because   they   are  pretentious  and  presumptuous   and
think/feel  that  they have/know  all that they need.   In
their  ignorance they do not know about  their  ignorance,
and  think that other  people   are responsible for  their
troubles.

     Many people do  not  knock,  because to do  so is  to
acknowledge  their dependency upon others who may say  no,
and  not   be willing to admit them in  an accepting  way.
They prefer not to take the risk of being rejected, and so
they stand outside the circle of human fellowship.

     Codependents need to learn to explicitly ask for what
they  really and honestly need:  recognition,  acceptance,
affection, love, encouragement, etc.

     Addicts need to be honest with themselves and  others
about  themselves,  about their behaviors and about  their
real needs; and  ask  for forgiveness and support in being
honest,  so that they can learn from past mistakes.

     We all  need  to regard life as a  process  in  which
meaning is  found together in the journey,  rather than at
some  magical destination.   The more we know, the more we
become  aware of even more that we do not know,  and  thus
the more we might seek to know.

     We all need to be respected by others,  and so we all
need to respect others as we would be respected, and knock
to ask for entry into others' lives---even though at times
we  may  be  denied entry.  Breaking in  does   not  bring
meaningful satisfaction.  Standing outside alone does  not
bring  meaningful  satisfaction.  Love points honestly  to
better ways.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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