This is http://www.essayz.com/a9009081.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %SEXUAL PLEASURE CHILD ADULT PARENT FAMILY WITHIN 900908 The child within, in the family within, is the expert in sexual desire, pleasure and behavior. Our bodies, as our children within in our families within, are the experts in sexual desire, pleasure and behavior. Our child within, our body, our id; by whatever name, is our expert in sexual desire, pleasure and behavior. Such expertise is not well identified with our parent or adult within, or with our super-ego or ego, by whatever name. Our biological parents, our parents within, our super-egos, our adults within our biological families, and within our families within---they all need to play their proper roles in promoting healthy sexual desires and expressions; by giving appropriate instruction, granting appropriate permission and encouragement---and then letting go and getting out of the way. On excessively risky occasions the role of the parent/super-ego and of the adult/ego of our biological family and/or of our family within is to withhold permission, to instruct in caution, and to discourage sexual desire, expression, pleasure and behavior. Such excessively risky occasions do not constitute the whole of our lives. Parents and adults that indicate otherwise were misguided and are misguiding in tragic ways. Parents and adults that do not get out of the way of healthy sexual desires, pleasures, expressions and behaviors of our child/body when occasions are appropriate, tragically misguided and are tragically misguiding. On appropriate occasions it is their responsibility to let go and get out of the way; not to be eternally present, exhorting and/or instructing. Only when (within appropriate contexts) we let go of, and are let go by our biological family's, and by our family within's parents and adults, are we able to become truly independent within new healthy inter-dependent sexual relationships, which lead to new and healthy families of our own which we can own honestly and in healthy ways. It is the responsibility of parents and adults to promote the development of such appropriate contexts for letting go. If they do not, the next generation is likely to be non-responsive and so not responsible. (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================