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  %AVOID COERCIVE VIOLENT RIDICULE CONFORM PRETENSE 900104

     We  surrender  to coercive people when we modify  our
behavior to avoid their threats of ridicule.  Surrender to
coercive   people  does  not  lead  them  to  become  less
coercive;   rather,   it encourages them  to  become  more
coercive.

     Rather than surrendering to coercive people's threats
of ridicule,  we need to be clear ourselves and make clear
to  others  that  the use of ridicule is never  worthy  of
respect.

     Ridicule is coercive,  violent,  and tends to destroy
personal  and communal integrity.  Ridicule is not a  tool
which  can  be  used  to  promote  personal  or   communal
integrity, and so should never be respected.

     Building  a communal context in which people who make
use  of  ridicule  are not respected is a  better  way  to
defend  ourselves  against  ridicule,  than is  trying  to
behave  in  ways which will deflect  ridicule  to  persons
other than ourselves. In a healthy communal context people
will  learn to avoid the use of ridicule,  rather than try
to  learn  which  people  they  can  ridicule  and  retain
respect.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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