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            %INTIMATE VS MANIPULATIVE COMMUNICATION 880811

     Often    the  purpose  of  a    communication  is  to
manipulate  other  person(s).   This is not  the  case  in
authentic  intimate  communication in  which  participants
engage  in dialogue with mutual respect and vulnerability.
Mutuality  by itself is not enough;  there must be  mutual
risk-taking  in  seeking  to  promote  both  personal  and
communal   integrity.   Mutuality  which  is  sadistic  or
masochistic  is  not  enough.  Sick people can  engage  in
mutual abuse, and fear to quit their mutual abuse, because
they do not know any other way of living. Such sick people
do not engage in authentically intimate communication with
mutual respect and vulnerability.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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