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                          %MYSTERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS 870110

     Mystery resides in relationships,  not in elements---
people,  things, objects, concepts,  etc.  which may enter
into   relationships.    Two  elements  may   enter   into
mysterious  and/or  non-mysterious  relationships.    Some
people  enter only into non-mysterious relationships.    A
few people may enter  only  into mysterious relationships.
Technocrats seek to  avoid mysterious relationships and so
perceive reality to  be  devoid of  mystery---according to
their  desire  that it be so.    Non-technically  oriented
people  seek  to find meaning in mysterious  relationships
and quite often find their fulfillment therein, along with
vulnerability, ambiguity, and suffering.   The technically
oriented find it difficult,  if not impossible,  to accept
the  mystery vulnerability,  ambiguity and suffering which
associated with meaningful living.

     Mystery is not the same as ignorance or naivete.   In
mysterious relationships---knowledge and dialogue  do  not
dispel the mysterious aspect of the relationship.  Mystery
is banished by choice,  not by knowledge.    The choice to
enter exclusively  into  I-It  relationships fragments the
integrity  which  is essential to a  life  of  meaning  in
mysterious I-Thou relationships.  Those who banish mystery
choose  to  be  insensitive  to  uncertain  and  ambiguous
aspects  of  living,   and  seek  security  within  futile
attempts  at  gaining  full  control  over  their  destiny
through the use of techniques.   The emotionally  insecure
fear  the uncertainty of mystery,  and seek refuge in  the
more  certain world  of  I-It relationships.   Because  of
their limited vision they  have  limited  perspectives and
limited understanding of the nature of reality.

     Mystery   is    present   in true intimate   personal
relationships.    Those who seek to avoid mystery seek  to
avoid true intimate personal relationships.  Their closest
personal  relationships lack genuine intimacy because they
are  not  dedicated  to  openness  and  honesty  with  the
vulnerability which they  entail.   Such intimacy as  they
may  act out is likely to be much like that of actors  who
do  not  personally  love their  opposite lead actor in  a
stage presentation of a  love story.   There is no mystery
in  their relationship---it is acted out according  to the
script.   Children internalize  insecurity which grows  in
such a deceptive atmosphere.   Such children (in a vicious
feed-back  loop)   seek  security in  the  world  of  I-It
relationships.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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