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 %DIFFERENCES AMONG COMMUNITIES ASSOCIATIONS GROUPS 080201
%ACCIDENTAL INTENTIONAL CHOSEN INVITED COERCED GOOD 080201
%EVIL RELATIONSHIPS INDIVIDUALS PEOPLE SPEAK LISTEN 080201
 %OPEN HONEST RISKY DIALOGUE VULNERABILITY DOMINATE 080201
%FORMAL INFORMAL INTIMATE AFFECTION SYMPATHY SEXUAL 080201
%NEIGHBORLY LOVE TENDER LOVING CARE HOSPITALITY GOD 080201

People are together in groups of people in diverse ways:

 1.  Walking  past each other on the crowded  sidewalk  of
one city block, but rarely talking to each other or making
eye contact.

 2.  Being-Together in  a room at a public meeting to hear
a special speaker; but rarely talking to each other.

 3.  Participating in a large formal  monthly meeting of a
citizens' action group or political organization,  but not
engaging  in  any personal/intimate conversations  one  on
one.

 4.  Participating  in  the  worship services of  a  large
mega-church, but otherwise not involved in the life of the
church.

 5.  As-in-number-Four,  but also  participating  in  some
small  intimate discussion groups and getting to know  the
people in those groups rather well.

 6.  Participating regularly in a church,  civic group, or
political group as one of the key  5 percent  of the group
who are the most active Core-of-the-Group.

 7.  Living  communally in an intimate commune where  each
one's life is bound up intimately with all  other's  lives
in a network of interdependent relationships.

The  above  seven items sketch  a  spectrum  of levels  of
inter-dependence in  different  groups ---   ranging  from
random  associations,   through intentional  associations,
lose-nit-communities, and into tightly-bound-communities.

The different groups differ in their levels/durations of:

 1.  Intentionality of association and activities.
 2.  Informality-Formality of modes of interactions.
 3.  Bonding, Dependency, and Core-Agreements.
 4.  Intimacies and interdependency and mutual-sacrifice.
 5.  Mutual-Commitment and/or Formal-Promises.
 6.  Mutual-Trust and Open-and-Honest-Dialogue.
 7.  Tolerating Unexpected-Differences and Surprises.
 8.  Tolerating Departures-from-Required-Behavioral-Norms.
 9.  Mutuality about values, ideals, principles, support.
10.  Mutual-Agreements about Primary Virtues-and-Vices.
11.  Robustness, Fragility, Brittleness, Toughness, etc.
12.  Playing Games-of-Mutual-Self-Deception.
13.  Addictions and Codependent-Support-Networks.
14.  Authentic Personal-Integrations-and-Integrities.
15.  Authentic Communal-Integrations-and-Integrities.
16.  Being able to adjust to Environmental-Changes.
17.  Honest Systems-Analyses of Communal-Environments.
18.  Maintenance of True-Reflexive-Conceptual-Structures.
19.  Transcendence of Individualistic-Orientations.
20.  Transcendence of Provincial-Orientations/Perspectives
21.  Flexibility and Ability-to-Make-Transitions/Changes.
22.  Dynamic-Stability and Ability-to-Maintain-Balance.

     Be-Together in the Many-Gracious Ways of Shalom.

                         (c) 2008 by Paul A. Smith in
                      "Search for Honesty and Integrity"
                    (On Being Yourself Whole and Healthy)

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