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                   %COVENANT AGREEMENT RELATIONSHIP 070201

     The  following  was  articulated  mutually  by  three
persons early in becoming involved in a close relationship
related  to  the  early evolution of  this  collection  of
essays.

     We who enter into this covenant relationship agree:

     1.  To  meet  humbly in the eternal  presence  of the
power which transcends us all.

     2.  To  respect each other's imperfect  personal  and
communal integrities.

     3.  To seek honesty and integrity through our growing
imperfect relationships.

     4.  To  cooperatively  seek  win-win  resolutions  of
conflicts among ideals and values.

     5.  To  respect each other's right to privacy and  to
be their own unique person.

     6.  That  truly  integrative human relationships  are
not achieved through control.

     7.  That none of us have the duty,  right, or need to
be in control of other persons.

     8.  That  it is not our duty,  right or privilege  to
fix or rescue dishonest people.

     9.  That   evil  grows  through  excommunication  and
within our alienative relationships.

    10.  That salvation is dynamic and cannot be  achieved
through any kind of conformity.

    11.  That balanced personal and communal integrity are
essential to true salvation.

    12.  That conditional personal acceptance,  affection,
and affirmations are unhealthy.

    13.  That  personal  manipulations,   coercion,    and
violence are disintegrative.

    14.  That powerful addicts'  and codependents' typical
behaviors do not merit respect.

    15.  That   exclusivity  often  leads  to  rejections,
alienation and evil relationships.

    16.  That   in   integrative   relationships   healthy
boundaries reflect human limitations.

    17.  That  honestly-taking-care-of-self  comes  before
healthy-caring-for-others.

    18.  That  we  cannot take-care-of-others  any  better
than we take-care-of-ourselves.

    19.  To  work  to transcend coercive and  manipulative
personal expectations.

    20.  To  work cooperatively towards balanced  communal
and personal relationships.

    21.  To  work  to  transcend  dichotomous   attitudes,
ideals, values and relationships.

    22.  To  honestly acknowledge our own and each other's
finitude and limitations.

    23.  To  give/accept true security as the gift of  the
freedom to be safely vulnerable.

    24.  To  be  as true as we can to ourselves  and  each
other in charity and humility.

    25.  To  honestly  share  our  experiences,  feelings,
needs, insights, ideals and values.

    26.  To  work  to learn as much as possible  from  our
errors, failures and tragedies.

    27.  To elicit respect for this covenant  relationship
to the best of our abilities.

    28.  That  other  people's  respect  for  a   covenant
relationship expands possibilities.

    29.  That  adversarial procedures are contrary to  the
above agreement.

    30.  That  is  evil for  other  considerations  to
undermine balanced consideration of these.

     Be Graciously-Together in the Many-Ways-of-Shalom.

                         (c) 2006 by Paul A. Smith in
                      "Search for Honesty and Integrity"
                    (On Being Yourself Whole and Healthy)

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