This is http://www.essayz.com/b0504123.htm         
Previous-Essay      <== This-Essay ==>     Following-Essay
Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words.
{Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.}
==========================================================
       =====>   See what editing of this essay will come later.  <======

%TRULY ENDURING MEANINGFUL SIGNIFICANT INTIMATE SEX 050412
%EVIL RELATIONS RELIABLE CREATIVITY UNILATERAL GOOD 050412
%SCRIPTS PLAYS ACTORS COLLUSION DOMINEERING CHARGES 050412
%STRICT FATHER FAMILY FRAMES QUESTIONS RESPONSE GOD 050412
%COMMAND LAW PRESCRIBE PROSCRIBE PLAN GOAL ACHIEVED 050412
%REWARD SUCCESS CONTROL COVENANT INVULNERABLE DEVIL 050412

     Truly   enduring,   meaningful,   significant  and/or
intimate relationships cannot be reliably-created:

 1.  Unilaterally,
 2.  By writing scripts for people to play as actors,
 3.  With any person or coalition "in charge",
 4.  In strict fulfillment of any rules or demands,
 5.  In response to any commands or prescriptions,
 6.  By assigning roles to intended participants,
 7.  In keeping with any person's vision/dream/fantasy,
 8.  In planned-response to terms of any promise/contract,
 9.  In controlled-response to the terms of any covenant,
10.  Without uncertainty, risk or vulnerability.

     Truly   enduring,   meaningful,   significant  and/or
intimate relationships are created:

 1.  Cooperatively,
 2.  Through creative mutual-courtship.
 3.  Through dynamic-balancing-acts by all involved,
 4.  Through authentic: dialogue, responses, consideration
 5.  Through freedom from strict commands/prescriptions,
 6.  By welcoming intentional potential participants,
 7.  By sharing visions, dreams and fantasies honestly,
 8.  Through liberations from the Fallen-Powers-That-Be,
 9.  Through desires to become more familiar and intimate,
10.  Accepting-Sharing uncertainty, risks & vulnerability.

     More often than has ever been publicly acknowledged
True-Lovers have fulfilled in significant part the  vision
of  the  second  set of  ten  descriptive  lines.    Their
fulfillment  therein  has not  been  publicly  described,
shared or acknowledged because:

 1.  Taboos about Boundary-Crossing-Intimacy were-violated
 2.  Collusive-Games-of-Mutual-Self-Deception were ignored
 3.  The Fallen-Powers-That-Be were Offended/Embarrassed.
 4.  Dominant-Religious-Leaders were Offended/Embarrassed.
 5.  Dominant-Paradigms were ignored and/or transcended.
 6.  Forbidden-Forms-of-Honesty were experimentally tested
 7.  Entrenched-Patterns-of-Control/Domination were hit.
 8.  Toleration of True-Lovers cannot be tolerated by many
 9.  The violation of laws and orders cannot be permitted.
10.  God is an angry-god of the Order-of-ADDICTION.

     Authentic   relationships  do  not  grow  because  of
utilitarian  considerations,   cost-benefit-analyses,   or
winning at others' expense.

     Authentic   relationships  grow/evolve  because   the
participants involved in them grow/evolve in their desires
to be more intimately involved in mutual and balanced self
revelations which are open,  honest,  authentic, risky and
entail mutual-balanced levels of safe-vulnerability.

     Defective  relationships decay/fall-apart because the
participants involved in them are alienated without desire
to be more intimately involved in mutual and balanced self
revelations which are open,  honest,  authentic, risky and
entail mutual-balanced levels of safe-vulnerability.  This
often  happens because of foci upon domination,  controls,
management, conformity, unilateral-efforts, etc.

                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
==========================================================