This is http://www.essayz.com/b0308121.htm Previous-Essay <== This-Essay ==> Following-Essay Click HERE on this line to find essays via Your-Key-Words. {Most frequent wordstarts of each essay will be put here.} ========================================================== %HEALTHY INTEGRATIVE BOUNDARIES SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP 030812 %BEHAVIORS RISKS PERSONAL COMMUNAL TERMS FOCUS EVIL 030812 %PROMOTE FACILITATE INCOHERENCE GENTLE COERCION SIN 030812 %POWER CONCENTRATION DOMINATION COMPASSION LIBERAL 030812 %CONSTRAINT INHIBIT EDUCATION LEARNING EXPERIMENTAL 030812 %EXISTENTIAL EVIDENCE ALIENATION ESTRANGEMENT FALL 030812 Down through the centuries ample evidence has accumulated indicating that we need to respect some boundaries between "SEXUAL" behaviors which entail great risks to personal and communal integrity; and SEXUAL behaviors which bear sweet fruits in terms of promoting and maintaining personal and communal integrity. Much depends upon what TERMS are central in the drawing of the boundaries. Consider the following contrasting TERMS: COHERENT-TERMS INCOHERENT-TERMS ============================ ========================== GENTLENESS COERCION COMPASSION DOMINATION POWER-SHARING POWER-CONCENTRATION LIBERATION CONSTRAINTS HONESTY PRETENTIOUSNESS HUMILITY ARROGANCE SHALOM VIOLENCE OPENNESS SECRECY SYMPATHY INDIFFERENCE HEALING DIS-EASE RELAXATION ANXIETY AUTHENTICITY CONFORMITY SPONTANEITY FORMALITIES PLEASURE PAIN INCLUSIVITY EXCLUSIVITY ACCEPTANCE REJECTION HOSPITALITY ATTACKS CIVILITY CONTENTIOUSNESS COOPERATION ARGUMENTATION SANCTUARIES FORTRESSES COMMUNITY ALIENATION COLLABORATION SUPERIORITY EGALITARIANISM COMPETITIVISM COHERENCE PURIFICATION MUTUALITY ISOLATIONISM BALANCE EXTREMISM TRANQUILITY TERRORISM Personal and communal integrities are encouraged, promoted and augmented when BOUNDARIES pertaining to expressions of human sexual desires are drawn in TERMS of REALITIES POINTED TO by words found on the left above. Personal and communal integrities are inhibited, undermined and diminished when BOUNDARIES pertaining to expressions of human sexual desires are drawn in TERMS of REALITIES POINTED TO primarily by words found on the right above. - - - - - - - Integrities are encouraged, promoted and augmented --- when true-lovers DRAW and MAKE USE OF the boundaries which are drawn. Integrities are inhibited, undermined and diminished --- when domineering people DRAW and ABUSE the boundaries which are drawn. - - - - - - - Integrities are encouraged, promoted and augmented --- when The Powers That Be are widely distributed and shared. Integrities are inhibited, undermined and diminished --- when The Powers That Be are narrowly concentrated into the hands of relatively few exclusive people. - - - - - - - Integrities are encouraged, promoted and augmented --- when The Powers That Be are focused upon building and maintaining sanctuaries --- within which all people are welcome and come to know true security as the freedom to be safely vulnerable with each other --- in open and honest dialogue about issues which most interest and/or concern them. Integrities are inhibited, undermined and diminished --- when The Powers That Be are focused upon issues of authority, control and domination --- in terms of absolute truths which are presumed to be eternal and mutually exclusive. - - - - - - - While the contrasts which have been drawn above are particularly striking in relationship to SEXUAL relationships, they are not limited to SEXUAL relationships. The contrasts which have been drawn above are relevant to all human relationships which entail: INTIMACY, OPENNESS, HONESTY, FRIENDSHIPS, COOPERATION, COLLABORATION, MUTUALITY, BALANCE, HEALTH, SHALOM, RECONCILIATION, PEACE, HEALING, GOODNESS, PEACEMAKING, RIGHTEOUSNESS, SALVATION. It is counter-productive to draw boundaries which make it appear that involvements in sexual relationships is generally evil, and the AVOIDANCE of the above listed integrative realities is generally good. Evil pertains to alienative RELATIONSHIPS. Goodness pertains to reconciling RELATIONSHIPS. Neither evil nor goodness pertains to individuals in and of themselves --- apart from their RELATIONSHIPS. Before we can enjoy personal and communal integrities we must focus upon whether or not our favorite ideas, ideals, principles, values, virtues, goals and leaders are focused upon facilitating and promoting integrations and integrities. If they are not focused upon facilitating and promoting integrations and integrities --- we need to make some changes! (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy) ==========================================================