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  %DIFFICULTIES CHALLENGES FACE DEALING ISSUES GOOD 030623
 %DEVILS CONTROL DOMINATION SYSTEMS INTIMATE SEXUAL 030623
 %RELATIONSHIPS MENTAL DISEASES CONTEXTS VULNERABLE 030623
 %INTEGRATIVE LEADERS NARROW MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE GOD 030623
 %IDOLATRY PARADOXES OBJECTIVE SUBJECTIVE REFLEXIVE 030623
 %POLITICAL RELIGIOUS SCHOLARS SCIENTIFIC OBJECTIVE 030623

     The  difficulties and challenges which we face   when
dealing with issues of control ---  are particularly great
and  important  when  we  are dealing with  intimate   and
sexual relationships.  In such cases:

     1.  There are  legitimate over-arching concerns about
both  physiological and mental diseases which are   shared
and/or  transmitted  within  the context of  intimate  and
sexual relationships.

     2.  There are  legitimate over-arching concerns about
disparities relating to:   vulnerability,  power,  control
and domination ---   and how to promote  both personal and
communal integrity in the face of such disparities.

     3.  There  is  a great need for the   integration  of
objective  and reflexive  paradigms.  However,  there  are
relatively    few   leaders  able   to   facilitate   such
integrations ---  because many (even if not most)  leaders
have specialized in in domineering ways.

     4.  Political,   religious,  scholarly and scientific
histories are full of the wrecks of  domineering  people's
unilateral  efforts to  settle their conflicts and battles
over how people "should" think, feel and  behave ---  when
they   are  confronted  with  humane  (but unconventional)
intimacy and sexuality.

     5.  Domineering  people   do  NOT  unilaterally   win
confrontations with true-lovers ---   because  true-lovers
make    it   evident  that  there  is  no   integrity   in
unilaterally determining the outcome of any  confrontation
with   any  person.     Such  honest  clarity   undermines
domineering people's efforts to be in control through  the
use of dishonest means.
                                                                                                                               
                         (c) 2005 by Paul A. Smith in      
                    (On Being Yourself, Whole and Healthy)  
                                                                                                                               
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